Interpersonal relationship is the direct psychological relationship or psychological distance between people in the process of activities. It reflects the psychological state of individuals or groups seeking to meet their social needs. Establishing good interpersonal relationship with others is one of the most important tasks in human social life. Research on interpersonal relationships shows that social support can reduce or prevent psychological harm caused by psychological pressure. People who don't have enough social support will feel lonely, because they feel isolated and helpless, or because they don't get enough opportunities to expose themselves in interpersonal communication. Therefore, contemporary college students should cultivate enough ability to properly handle their interpersonal relationships and avoid problems in interpersonal communication. Only in this way can we create first-class performance in our future work, which is more conducive to realizing our dreams.

Problems existing in college students' interpersonal communication

Lack of initiative

1. The "egocentric" thought of contemporary college students is playing a role. Because contemporary college students are only children, they have been spoiled by their parents for a long time and are used to being self-centered. They always consider themselves from their own point of view and don't care too much about other people's positions, so there will always be more unpleasant situations in their communication, which is not conducive to the embodiment of initiative. At the same time, as an only child, she often passively accepts the love given by her parents, so she is not used to taking the initiative. Sometimes interpersonal communication is limited to a few close friends. They are not used to talking to strangers on their own initiative and think that they should not express too much information to strangers. They prefer to go their own way and can't stand setbacks. If you are rejected or a little unhappy when interacting with strangers for the first time, it will bring you a lot of satisfaction, unlike when interacting with friends. After this experience, you will be reluctant to talk to strangers. Even if you passively accept to participate in the conversation, you may not appear very active.

2. "Unreal emotionalism" is also a factor that affects the initiative of college students' interpersonal communication. Because contemporary college students are too addicted to the illusory world of the network and are unwilling to return to reality. Therefore, in the face of complex interpersonal relationships, some students take the way of escaping or seeking reasonable alternatives. The development of the network provides a stage for college students to find a virtual emotional world. So they don't want to take the initiative to find ways to improve interpersonal relationships and make themselves active. 3. Unhealthy psychology often affects the embodiment of interpersonal initiative. Some college students have a sense of inferiority, have no courage to do things in social communication, are used to echoing voices and have no initiative. Other college students always hold an indifferent attitude towards people and things, and always think that "it's none of their business, just hang high" and everything will be fine.

(2) It's not a disadvantage to act willfully without considering other people's feelings, because if we behave like this in life, others may think that this person is very frank and does nothing. However, acting spontaneously in interpersonal communication often leads to the rigidity of interpersonal relationship. For example, doing things completely according to your own ideas, regardless of other people's opinions, will make people feel that you are willful and not modest; Act spontaneously, do whatever you want, and others will think you are unorganized and undisciplined if you don't pay attention to the time and place. You often change your mind and act without careful planning or prior instructions, which makes people feel that you are reckless and lack sincerity.

(3) Don't pay attention to your words and deeds. When dealing with interpersonal relationships, our words and deeds are particularly important. Who will make friends with you if your words are dirty? Which company wants such employees? People who behave generously, dress appropriately and talk elegantly are welcome everywhere. Everyone was born in different families, grew up in different living environments, had different lifestyles, and naturally developed different living habits. Every living habit may make you not recognized or accepted by your family, but some of these unacknowledged habits may bring unnecessary trouble to your future, affect your talent display and even be unacceptable to society.

Improvement of interpersonal relationship? Everyone wants to get along well with others and have good interpersonal relationships.

Interpersonal communication circle

In college life, interpersonal relationship has always been an important factor affecting one's mental health and study. The problem of communication and getting along with others is not unique to universities, but the performance of this problem among college students has its particularity. First of all, college students have relatively little experience in dealing with people, and this problem became prominent after entering the university. To a great extent, this has brought some pressure to college students to establish good interpersonal relationships. Building a harmonious interpersonal relationship in a short time often requires a lot of skills, and students often only feel the importance and pressure of this problem, but lack the necessary experience and skills. Then, how can we get along well with people on the campus of the university and make full preparations for interpersonal communication in the future society? We might as well start from the following aspects:

This initiative should be embodied in interpersonal communication.

Correct thinking is conducive to promoting the initiative of interpersonal communication. Marxist philosophy expounds that human nature is related to human freedom and personality liberation. The initiative of interpersonal communication embodies the freedom of will to know and respond appropriately with the help of external things. Marx said: "Freedom includes not only what I live by, but also how I live, including not only my realization of freedom, but also my realization of freedom." "Freedom lies not in relying on the laws of nature, not in independence in fantasy, but in knowing these laws, so as to make the laws of nature serve certain goals in a planned way." Without ideological initiative, all other efforts are in vain.

(2) Establish a healthy attitude. College students are the most energetic young people, and healthy psychology is also an essential factor for college students to show their initiative in interpersonal communication.

1. You should be confident. "I am the greatest miracle of nature. Since God created everything on earth, no one can be like me. My brain, heart, eyes, ears, hands, hair and lips are all different. No one has ever talked and done things like me, not now and never will. Therefore, I am unique in nature. " (4) Self-confident people will be decisive, not timid, and easy to show initiative in interpersonal communication, which is more conducive to establishing good interpersonal relationships.

2. Be tolerant. As the saying goes, "All rivers run into the sea, with great tolerance". Only with a broad mind can you feel that you can face up to your own shortcomings and forgive others' mistakes when interacting with you. It is more conducive to the continued development of our interpersonal relationship and to the improvement of interpersonal relationship.

3. Have your own personality psychology. For college students, the similarity of personality is the attraction that many students like to find in interpersonal communication or friend selection, so it is easier to show their initiative in communication with each other.