"Perfectionism is an epidemic," said Psychology Today, a bimonthly American psychology magazine. It is true that the acceleration of social rhythm makes people pursue perfection, but excessive perfectionism will be self-defeating, making people anxious and depressed, and it is difficult to reach the peak of success.
On the one hand, the ever-changing times have troubled parents, making them exert greater pressure on their children's success, and shaping their offspring with perfectionism through oral language, sigh, silence and frown.
On the other hand, this personality makes people rigid, loses the flexibility to adapt to the changing world, and is prone to anxiety about uncertain things.
First of all, perfectionists often set unattainable standards for themselves, so they are doomed to reap ruthless setbacks and even immerse themselves in fear before failure and pessimism after failure.
Second, people with high standards are not all perfectionists. The key to perfectionism is to worry too much about making mistakes and think that any performance is a full embodiment of one's ability and image. "Even if there is an earthquake, they will never run out without makeup." They try their best to avoid or cover up their mistakes, so it is difficult for them to grow and improve from their mistakes and failures. For example, some athletes end their sports career early in the rising period. In fact, the more you are afraid of making mistakes, the easier it is to make mistakes. Psychological research has proved that excessive exercise distorts athletes' movements and reduces students' memory.
Third, fear of making mistakes may turn into doubt and uncertainty about one's own behavior, thus repeating meaningless actions and repeated examinations, which is an important symptom of obsessive-compulsive disorder and generalized anxiety.
Besides, perfectionists still find it difficult to get along with people around them. Gao Lan Shaha, a professor of psychology at Yale University, believes that perfectionists usually feel that they are more capable than others, so they are tired of interpersonal communication and are prone to criticize, hate and even attack others and society. Qu Yuan, an ancient poet, had a tragic color of perfectionism all his life. He "holds hands" and disdains to interact with street doctors. "The world is turbid, and I am alone." Finally, he completely despaired of the outside world and had to sink into the river.
In fact, "perfection" doesn't mean "excellence": the former is to be frustrated and unsuccessful, and the latter is to enjoy success. If "perfection" has become your bondage, remember to review the benefits of imperfection often. First, divert attention. When the pursuit of "the best" is exhausted, stop, watch a movie, play a game, and then re-examine the true meaning of happiness. Second, make mistakes on purpose. You can always try to go out without makeup: did others laugh at you? Did I underestimate you? New feelings will give you new ideas.
The trouble of life lies in the pursuit of perfect debate.
Best society
The Debate Competition of College Students Cup, sponsored by the Debate Association of Nanchang University, officially started in the Student Activity Center on February 65438+February 65438, 2008. The guests invited by this activity are the vice chairman of Nanchang University Student Union and the vice chairman of Nanchang University Student Union. Participants in this competition are representatives from information engineering college, science college, environmental engineering college and law school. Some of them are experienced players and some are freshmen.
In the contest between the Institute of Information Technology and the College of Science, the title of Zheng Fang Institute of Information Technology is "All men are created equal", while the title of the opposing side is "All men are created unequal". A topic closely related to our life, the positive side is that the equality of all people should be the equality of personality, dignity and rights. Their debater said, "Equality does not mean complete equality. They pursue equality because they are born equal. What kind of prince would you rather have? " Opponents think that people are unequal, while those in favor are ungrateful. They think Bobby Chen and Guangwu said these words because they think they are born equal. On the positive side, people, born in this world, are random and unpredictable. They can't choose their birth, but they also have the right to pursue happiness, so they are equal. On the other hand, it is pointed out that some people are born in developed countries and enjoy benefits that people born in underdeveloped countries cannot compare. The two sides were angry and the scene was fierce.
The second objector is the representative from law school, whose view is that "the trouble of life lies in the pursuit of perfection", and the representative from Zheng Fang Institute of Environmental Engineering, whose view is that "the happiness of life lies in the pursuit of perfection". On the positive side, "perfection" means perfection without regrets. When we pursue perfection, we make continuous progress, improve our ability, enhance our value and quality, and we will be happy and gratified by our progress. Perfection does not mean ambition, but improving one's thinking, correcting one's mistakes and improving one's ability. "Progress is not equal to the pursuit of perfection. When we work hard, we don't pursue perfection, but progress. Pursuing perfection is a process of pursuing nothingness and an excessive expression. In the process of pursuing perfection, we will continue to encounter setbacks, and we will continue to feel that our goals are getting farther and farther, and anxiety will follow, which is very stressful. Can we still be happy? " This is a wonderful argument of the opposing side.
After the debate, the two seniors made wonderful comments for them: everyone said it was wonderful and reasonable, but there were still some problems to be improved.
As a result of this competition, representatives from the School of Science and the School of Environmental Engineering won, and the best debaters were Shangguan Jiangbo from the School of Information Technology and a representative from the Law School. The students who listened to the game said that Shangguan Jiangbo was humorous and won applause for a while.
In the spirit of "persisting in rationality and thinking about life", this activity publicizes the slogan of "gathering talents and flying with passion", aiming at providing a stage for the majority of Changda students to show the charm of the debate. According to the director of the planning department of the Debate Association, the event achieved their expected results, because there were no emergencies during their organization, the scene was in good order, the audience enjoyed the spirit and everything went smoothly according to their original plan.