In life, everyone will encounter setbacks, and moderate setbacks have certain positive significance, which can help people get rid of inertia and urge people to forge ahead. Frustration is also a challenge and test. British philosopher Bacon said: "Most miracles beyond nature occur in the conquest of adversity." The key problem is how to face setbacks.

People want to be more happy, less painful, more successful and less frustrated all their lives, but fate always seems to play tricks on people and torture them, always giving them more loss, pain and frustration. I remember reading such a story: there was a pupa on the grass, which was found by a child and brought home. A few days later, a small crack appeared on the pupa, and the butterfly inside struggled for a long time, as if its body was stuck. Naive children can't bear to see butterflies struggling in pupae. So, he picked up scissors to cut open the pupa shell and help the butterfly get rid of the pupa. But because the butterfly didn't go through a painful struggle before breaking the pupa, its body was bloated and its wings shriveled, so it couldn't fly at all and soon died. Naturally, the happiness of this butterfly disappeared forever with its death. This little story also illustrates a life truth. To be happy, you must be able to endure pain and frustration. This is a kind of tempering for people, and it is also a necessary process for a person to grow up.

There are many factors that cause setbacks. For example, the goal is set too high, and there is a gap between ability and expectation. In addition, it also includes psychological conflict factors. For example, a college student, who really wants to concentrate on his PhD, is in love; Reading and love are like fish and bear's paw. He wants to have both, but the best thing for him is to choose only one. This is a "two-way conflict". Another example is a pair of men and women in love. After several contacts, they felt that they had talked about everything and there was nothing to talk about. They can only look at me, and I look at you, which is embarrassing, but a person will feel more lonely. This is called "avoidance-avoidance conflict"

When people encounter setbacks, they often feel insecure and difficult to settle down, and their work and life will be affected. Then, when people suffer setbacks, how should they debug? Here are ten ways to try:

First, calm down, calm down, calm down.

Second, enhance self-confidence and courage.

Third, judge the situation and win by circuitous means. The so-called detour victory means that the goal remains the same and the method has changed.

Fourth, make persistent efforts and persevere. When you encounter setbacks, you should go forward bravely. The goal you set remains the same, so redouble your efforts.

Fifth, replace trees with flowers and be flexible. If the original goal that is too high can't be achieved for a while, you can change to a goal that is easier to achieve. This is also an adaptive way.

Sixth, find out the reasons and clear the train of thought. When you encounter setbacks, calm down first, find out the possible reasons, and then seek a solution to the problem.

Seventh, emotional transfer, seeking sublimation. You can adjust your mood and sublimate your mood by collecting stamps, writing, calligraphy, art, music, dancing and physical exercise that you like.

Eighth, learn to vent and get rid of pressure. Facing setbacks, different people have different attitudes. Some people are disappointed, others are hesitant. At this time, you might as well find one or two people who understand your closeness and pour out all your words. From the perspective of mental health, catharsis can eliminate the mental stress caused by setbacks and reduce mental fatigue; At the same time, catharsis is also a self-psychological rescue measure, which can dilute and alleviate bad emotions.

Ninth, seek psychological counseling when necessary. When people are overwhelmed by setbacks, they might as well turn to psychological counseling institutions. Psychologists will treat you with emotion, understand you with reason, guide you with actions, and follow the instructions, so that you can step into the realm of "a village with a bright future" from the predicament of "no doubt".

Tenth, learn to be humorous and laugh at yourself. Humor and self-mockery are effective ways to vent depression, balance mentality and create happiness. When you encounter setbacks, you might as well use Ah Q's spiritual victory method, such as "losing money is a blessing", "breaking money to avoid disaster" and "losing money to earn money" to adjust your unbalanced psychology. Still "confused and hard to change", look at setbacks calmly and adjust your mentality with humor.

In this world, it is impossible to be proud of the spring breeze and everything goes well. To be open-minded in the face of setbacks, to be as wise as a fool, and to maintain a calm and peaceful attitude is to understand the generosity of life. If a person wants to maintain a healthy mentality, he needs to sublimate his spirit, cultivate his morality, save his strength and be humorous and optimistic. As Marx said: "A good mood can relieve the fatigue and pain of the body more than ten good medicines."