This is a composition, because I haven't written it for a long time, and the tight string has been in a tight state. I didn't think of any suitable topic at once. Just talk about my recent thoughts. I need some time to slowly find the feeling of chicken soup dog.
At the moment, I am sitting at the desk in my dormitory. All the information on the desk is about my graduation thesis. There is really nothing to say about living on campus at two o'clock every day. I just wander in the grid of the course every day and consume myself in the task list that lives in my mind.
To tell the truth, there are not many classes this year, but I am exhausted. The completed registration form for college graduates is very good in paper and as white as cold light. There are many small squares in it, which need to fill in all kinds of basic information, social work during school, awards and so on.
I don't know how many times this kind of thing has been filled in since childhood. We need to try our best to recall and condense what we have experienced in the past, and then extract some seemingly shiny color collages to form a complete picture. I have the ability to fill in this form, but I will feel a little lost when I write it, so that form is the fastest I can complete, which will reduce my sense of loss.
In fact, I am my best work, which is more convincing than every award I have won. Unfortunately, I didn't have a chance to show it to anyone. The society only looks at the data, our titles and our awards, and whether we have had a prominent moment in a certain group. He won't care how much fuel we have now.
Even if one day we fill our own stepping stone, we will still find it ordinary and boring.
Anxiety can be perceived, especially the anxiety of others, because it is as powerful as the butterfly effect.
In the next semester of junior year, the students who watched the drama all day put away their mobile phones and ipad, and the students who played games intercepted pictures in the circle of friends to uninstall various games. Some people began to think of ways to practice fake notes, and some people quietly paid attention to the topic of postgraduate entrance examination in Zhihu. ...
In fact, everyone is not stupid, knowing that it is time to find another way out, and then the surrounding high pressure comes.
What tortures people in senior three is not anxiety, but a sense of uncertainty. At this time, the general direction has been determined. The postgraduate students reviewed the second round and the third round, and the job seekers silently commented on several HR on WeChat. The documents for going abroad are almost complete, and entrepreneurs have begun to go in and out of relevant occasions in suits and ties, and spend all day studying in the library. No matter what kind of people, they all know what road they are on now, but they don't know whether this road is flat or not and how far they can go.
What really makes seniors unhappy is the sense of uncertainty and gap. I don't know how much I weigh, and I'm not sure if I can become an image that matches the image displayed on social media. Maybe I'm not brave enough to position myself. If you ask me, step by step. If you walk too fast, you will screw up every step.
Uh-huh, the moment of being at a loss has come. Because what can make you start in Lyon on campus is useless to enter the society.
Half a month ago, I saw a friend send a circle of friends: "Senior three is too bitter ... too bitter ..."
The following news is from our contemporaries:
"Same, same .."
"+ 10086"
"That's right!"
A year or two after graduation, the senior sighed and teased like a n experienced person:
"By the end of your senior year, you will know that the current efforts are just floating clouds ..."
"Oh, my god, you are only a senior. I really want to kill you who are complaining ..."
"Graduation thesis is not difficult enough ... I have time to complain ..."
"Cherish it, and you won't understand the happiness of college until you graduate."
I solemnly praised it and didn't know what to comment on.
It was this friend who complained bitterly. A few days ago, he showed the certificate and trophy of a professional competition. In the photo, he is full of energy, holding a certificate and a trophy and smiling brightly.
I don't doubt whether these two situations are contradictory at all, because senior three is a magical period, where ecstasy and tingling, happiness and pressure are intertwined, driving people crazy, and it is right to stimulate you anyway. You can stand on the podium and accept everyone's flash and applause. After removing makeup, you can go back to the empty dressing room and still frown. What have I got? Why am I unhappy?
Glory that looks glamorous is like a candy, and the taste disappears after a while. But you know, sugar is not enough, you need to eat it, even though you don't like anything really nutritious.
Those small achievements and experiences at school are too much like playing house.
People often comment that I look very independent, have my own plans, and are not easily shaken by the outside world. At first, I didn't believe it either, but people said so much that I really thought I was a person who wanted to understand everything.
For a long time, I thought that the road under my feet would lead to a good distance, as long as I walked on the established road and continued my ideal with the idealism of not worrying about the future on campus.
Over the past year, I have met many people and all kinds of strangers, some of whom I like very much and some of whom I don't want to see again. Many family and friends have different views on you, give you this view and give you that advice, and then their decision becomes what to do for.
They gave me a lot of inspiration and made me reflect on my present life. Suddenly I found myself indulging in a small circle for too long, and I was easily disdained by some cheap and childish sense of accomplishment. But then again, some things can't be done if you want to. You are incapable, not that you can't do it yourself, but that your family can't fully support you. Youth is capital, but the function of this capital is also premised.
The pain of senior three is my own slap. Tell yourself never to take everything you see as the whole world, never think that you are not bad now, and get along with yourself by feeling good about yourself. After graduation, you will mix with society. This is an abyss. Whether wandering or falling, it is in the abyss.
The pain of senior three is a slap in the face, telling myself that if there is still time to be melodramatic and entangle other people's comments and opinions, it must be that you are not busy enough and things are not urgent enough to cherish the present. This is my opinion of myself, so I have no leisure to take care of others. I don't do anything to convince others, because I won't get anything in return, so what I give myself is the best.
Never fall in love with one thing after doing it. We just turn ourselves into a test paper, soak it completely, and then see what kind of chemical reaction we can have, admit that we are still groping, constantly contacting new things, contacting the outside world and reacting. As for physical, biological or chemical reactions, only you know best.
That's all that matters.
This blueprint for life, the chief designer is definitely not himself in his early twenties. They only have the right to speak, not to decide. They just need to broaden themselves, realize their limitations and get in touch with more and more strangers and strange moments in the world. They are carrying semi-finished products.
Time goes by, time goes by again, and when we calm down, there may be a little possibility.
Therefore, the future is still a long way to go, and the future can be expected.