It's working day again Holidays always end quickly. I really want to live like this for another five hundred years!
Many friends said that they didn't sleep enough, didn't go shopping enough, didn't buy enough clothes, didn't eat enough rice, didn't play enough games and didn't watch enough movies, and Nima had to go to work again.
I was awakened by the doorbell early in the morning. I thought it was a courier. When I opened the door, I saw that it was a college classmate. I said, "Long time no see, come in and sit down!" He said, "No, please sign for it." (@ Professor Yin)
Sincerely thank Mr. Qu Yuan for giving us a holiday with his life!
Vacation is actually the most popular way to commemorate people. I want to commemorate 365 historical celebrities in the same way: Confucius, Mencius, Zhuangzi, Han Feizi, Cao Cao, Liu Bei, Sun Quan, Zhuge Liang, Li Bai, Du Fu, Su Shi, Bai Juyi, Kangxi, Yongzheng and Gan Long.
I miss my relatives twice during the festive season and gain three pounds. Sao nian, do you dare to weigh yourself?
What? Fat people are harder to resist the temptation!
Researchers at Florida State University School of Medicine selected more than 65,438+0,900 participants and analyzed their weight and personality characteristics. The results showed that the weight of the subjects increased by 10%, and the impulsiveness of personality increased (that is, it was more difficult to resist temptation). The more you eat, the fatter you get, and the road will be dark!
If you are fat, you don't want to move, but if you don't move, you want to eat. That's it anyway, so eat hard. Oh, this is really a sad story.
Don't feel sorry for a fat girl, the jewelry given by her boyfriend will be several laps longer than others! The clothes and fabrics bought at the same price are just a little more!
Hmm! Girls with big faces will get more cosmetics from their boyfriends in the future than others! For girls with thick fingers, the gold ring given by her boyfriend is just bigger than others!
I'm really excited to think about it, as if I really have a boyfriend.
You need a boyfriend with thick fingers? Are you kidding?
Otaku, did you build it? Girls like men who have muscles, don't play games, love sports and have no beard!
According to a survey, among netizens aged 1074 18-45, muscular men are more popular with girls, accounting for 60%; But girls are particularly disgusted with boys who like to play games, accounting for 57.5%; Boys who like playing football or ball games account for 70% of the popularity, while women who like men to grow beards are less than 20%.
With so many demands, can such a boy be gay? Handsome and rich, I have to say something else.
Again, men ask less of girls, but big breasts are enough.
Come on, foreign talents! The requirements for applying for a "green card" in China have been lowered!
From the implementation of the "green card" system in 2004 to the end of 20 1 1, China only issued more than 4,700 green cards, with an annual average of 248, which was dubbed as the most difficult country to get a green card. To this end, the relevant departments are actively studying and revising the management measures for the approval of "green cards", lowering the threshold for "green cards" and increasing efforts to attract overseas talents.
Come and drink waste oil, eat poisoned milk powder and suck smog? We practiced. Applicants are advised to strengthen their own exercise before going abroad, and may wish to eat some batteries.
The Health Experience Report of Immigrants in new york shows that the lead content of immigrants from Chinese mainland is 44% higher than that of other new immigrants from Asia, the cadmium content is 60% higher, the mercury content is 530% higher, and the mercury content is 660% higher than that of new york natives. Many foreigners mistakenly believe that China people's staple food is batteries.
Besides, aren't you afraid of the chengguan attacking foreigners?
Recently, the urban management department of Hanyang, Wuhan, used the method of "civilized relay" to punish illegal pedestrians, that is, if a pedestrian is found crossing the road at a red light, the pedestrian must "be on duty" for the city appearance supervisor until the next illegal pedestrian is caught.
Yes, you are right. It's my chengguan. Urban management is really in charge of the air in the world!
I remember when I was a child, I was caught in the corner by my teacher until I caught the next speaker. The teacher's practice of beating students with students is hateful!
Well, after they catch a corrupt official, they are allowed to work in the procuratorate and are not allowed to eat or drink until they catch another corrupt official to replace themselves, thus reminding officials to be honest and clean.
If there are no people who run red lights, can they be laid off?
Three years later, a group of people ran a red light, and the people standing next to them were moved to tears: 1000 stormy days and nights, I hope the stars and the moon finally look forward to you.
Leadership! My family is also very difficult!
Wang, the water resources management office of Mizhi County, Shaanxi Province, has been exposed for more than ten years, and he still works part-time in this county 1 company, receiving double salary. A person in charge analyzed: Wang's wife has no job, and the whole family depends on Wang's income to maintain their lives. The family situation is difficult, so you can use other time to earn some extra money.
It's good to have an empty salary and a leader to intercede.
The hawker's home is even more difficult. It is really "comrades are as warm as spring, and enemies are as cold as winter."
If you earn 3,000 yuan a month, have no other benefits, can't make extra money by using work resources, attend work normally, always be on the front line, sometimes your life may be in danger, and you will refuse to help your relatives and friends mercilessly. What do you do this kind of work for?
Someone is always willing to do it! Willing to serve the people! Leadership! You should give him a raise!
66-year-old village official, served for 42 years, with an annual salary of 300 yuan. Chen, leader of Group 28, Guangxing Village, Shanpo Street, Jiangxia District, Wuhan, and leader of unpaid production 16 years. The village leader worked for 26 years and got 200 yuan's annual salary, and only rose to 300 yuan four years ago.
He said: "I don't want to be an official, and I don't care about this reward. It's just that everyone trusts me so much. This is a responsibility. If you don't do it, you can't do it. "
Give Chen a compliment. By the way, can you stop bullying honest people?
Give this brave boy a compliment! Since ancient times, heroes have been teenagers!
On May 3 1, a man was stabbed with a knife on a bus from Yichun, Jiangxi Province to Jin Rui Town, Yuanzhou District. A junior high school boy who was chopped twice bravely rushed up, grabbed the murderer's knife and pushed it to the ground. Later, the man escaped from the car!
The boy's name is Liu Yanbing, and the hacking happened without any warning. Because he took the murderer's knife, he was seriously injured and it took him five hours to get out of danger. The teacher went to visit him, and the first thing he said was, can I still take the college entrance examination this year?
No matter whether you can get in or not, or how well you do in the college entrance examination in a few days, your answer sheet is already excellent.
Such a brave boy, I suggest that the People's Public Security University of China directly admit him! I wish him a speedy recovery.
Ladies and gentlemen, are you dragging your feet?
According to the survey report, the average starting salary of college graduates in China last year was 3378 yuan, and the higher the education, the higher the starting salary. Among them, junior college students are 2285 yuan, undergraduate students are 3278 yuan, master students are 546/kloc-0 yuan, and doctoral students are 8800 yuan. High school level may not directly bring high income, but the average starting salary of graduates from ordinary undergraduate colleges and higher vocational colleges is higher than that of "2 1 1 engineering" colleges.
Today, it's my fault. Procrastination has nothing to do with anyone. The good days at school have created my arrogance and led to the inevitable drag today. I am willing to bear everything today. In fact, I am very grateful to you for letting me drag on today, not later. I will work hard, study with an open mind and strive for a raise! (Rongyaba)
Call on relevant departments to understand. If you do this, my family will definitely ask me where the other money went. (Zhuang Xiansen Nan)
It's graduation season in June again. How are you going to film your graduation photo?
Is it a four-person group of Tang Priest and Master?
Or "Wedding graduation photo"?
Still a lot of female ghosts.
This is the creative graduation photo of Shen Zhou, School of Design, Jiangnan University. "Teacher, thank you for accepting me as an apprentice three years ago!" "This is the only thoughtless thing I have done in three years." Other people's tutors are selling cute! What about yours?
Having a good teacher is a blessing for students! Teachers will be happy to have such students!
The bachelor's uniform is rented, graduation photo is put on display, the graduation thesis is copied, the internship report is forged, the defense is water, and the employment agreement cheats the employment rate. Everything is false, only time is true, it tells you every day: youth will eventually end, and you will soon leave this school that you hated and loved.
Class is over!