A while ago, Zhao's fans were full of expectations, and she finally returned to the entertainment circle after giving birth to a baby.

Female stars easily fade out of people's sight when they are young. Zhao said in an interview that "it is a good thing not to be afraid of being forgotten", and she will bring new works as soon as possible, so that everyone can get familiar with themselves again from the beginning.

However, before the fans cheered, negative voices came one after another:

"Not as cute as before."

"The girlish feeling is gone."

"There was no gas field before."

In the entertainment circle that pursues small meat and young ladies, once a woman enters the age of 30, she will face a career crisis, especially after giving birth to a child, even if her figure changes a little, she can hold back, and some even say that she is old and fat.

In the public's impression, the "national husband" will always be single in the end, and the "little fairy" had better not get married and have children.

How happy the expectant mothers who are pregnant in October are, how painful it will be for them to return to the workplace.

Stars like Zhao are still like this, not to mention the mother of countless beings.

0 1 barriers to returning to the workplace

Postpartum depression if you are not careful

Wang Shixian, a former member of the China Badminton Team, was promoted to mother in June this year and gave birth to a son named "Little Coffee".

She said that she was afraid of postpartum depression, and that sense of unknown also made her feel anxious.

"I became a little fragile after giving birth to a child. If the little coffee is a little bad, I will be nervous. He sneezed twice, and I wondered if he had caught a cold. When he coughs, I also worry about whether there is anything wrong. In fact, it is the normal development process of children, but I will enlarge it infinitely. "

Postpartum mothers have a hard time. They devote themselves to their children during the day, breast-feed frequently at night, lack of sleep and are sentimental. Coupled with the shrinking social circle, they were worried and depressed for a long time after returning home. In severe cases, depression or suicidal thoughts will occur.

It is difficult to go out, and it is even harder to go far away.

When pregnant, the baby can go anywhere. When a child lands, going out is like moving.

All kinds of maternal and child products, clothes, diapers, food, baby bottles, baby carriages, 7788 are packed in several big bags.

It's ok in the city. Large shopping malls have maternal and child rooms. If you travel or go back to your hometown, you don't know, you think it's a great migration.

On the one hand, to ensure the baby's diet and rest, on the other hand, shopping or taking care of seven aunts and eight aunts is simply superhuman powers.

Postpartum friends circle is small. If mothers can't go out shopping, can't travel freely, and have no space for themselves at all, they will be exhausted physically and mentally.

The interviewer said "men first"

Many expectant mothers, for various reasons, may choose to leave their jobs before giving birth.

When the baby was two or three years old, he went to kindergarten and came out to look for a job.

On recruitment websites around the country, a large number of resumes were submitted, and few people responded.

Because in personnel recruitment, there is an invisible rule:

Newly married girls don't talk because they will get pregnant;

Women who are preparing to have a second child do not recruit, and when they are older, they are likely to muddle along in the future;

Middle-aged women who are divorced from society refuse to recruit and have little ability to work.

Discrimination is so naked that men and women will never be truly equal.

It is difficult for women over 30 to find grass-roots jobs; Compared with men, women themselves lack advantages.

Another hidden rule in the recruitment industry is "male priority". Even for the position of administrative secretary, boys are eager to apply.

The plight of working mothers

The position was replaced during maternity leave.

A friend of mine said to me. Just after maternity leave, she returned to the department and found that a little girl with less qualifications suddenly became her leader.

She's unbelievable. You know, she works hard and has done well for three years.

It's just that after she got pregnant, she was delayed for 2 years and didn't get the favor of the department director. Although the work is as serious as ever.

Other companies will find someone to temporarily replace people on maternity leave. If the replacement person performs well, he will become a full member directly. Only mothers can be eliminated.

Lack of special care during lactation

Once mothers unload their goods and return to work, the special treatment of the past will become yesterday.

More than 93% of the units will not set up a separate maternal and child room, and mothers can only quietly walk into the bathroom to "carry milk".

If you catch up with the meeting in the morning or afternoon, you can only endure the severe pain and pretend as if nothing has happened.

Although you can have 1 hour breastfeeding leave during lactation, many companies don't give it, some have a heavy workload, and mothers can't get off work early.

If you keep in shape like a girl, people will ask you: When do you want a second child?

If your figure is out of shape, people will say: it's terrible to have a baby.

Zhang Xinyi, who was ridiculed as "out of shape and losing weight is not self-disciplined", responded at that time: "Be more tolerant and respectful to a breastfeeding mother."

This sentence tells the bitterness of countless mothers.

Left-handed baby, right-handed work

As a super mother, I am not afraid of anything. I was afraid that when Xiong Haizi was ill, the boss suddenly said that he would work overtime.

When the baby is sick, mothers can't sleep all night, changing diapers, breastfeeding and taking the temperature to put the baby to sleep. When the baby is relieved, it will be dawn soon.

No matter how tired and sleepy you are, you should stick to fighting like a sleepy soldier.

A great mother can be said to live in the cracks.

Continuous learning and lifelong growth are the only magic weapons to build workplace competitiveness.

If a woman's career is very successful, then most people are concerned about whether her family is equally "successful".

How to balance work and family?

Not long ago, a group of interview videos in Zhang Quanling got a hot search, which caused extensive discussion.

A male reporter asked: As a female entrepreneur, how to balance career and family?

Zhang Quanling, who has always been intellectual and gentle, was obviously "bombed" when asked this question.

"First of all, I want to tell you clearly that I hate this question. Behind this problem is prejudice itself. "

In fact, Zhang Quanling has mastered the skills of balancing life and work. But she hates this topic.

"Why are you curious about this question?

The reason why you are curious is that you have to balance. I don't know if everyone has a balance, so I will be curious.

You never say out of curiosity, why don't you play basketball with Yao Ming?

Because you don't think I need to achieve this, I think you are biased. "

Speaking of which, Zhang Quanling seems to be speaking for women. She asked the male reporter:

"I am particularly curious, when you interview male entrepreneurs, do you ask balanced questions?"

The reporter honestly replied: I will also ask.

Zhang Quanling continued to ask, "Who did you ask? How to answer? "

The reporter responded for 2 seconds and replied irrelevantly: "Most of them are mothers, and mothers take on this role more."

Finally, Zhang Quanling hit the nail on the head to ask:

"You asked if the man was at home, why didn't you feel that the man was gone?"

The reporter looked embarrassed and didn't know how to answer. But the answer is obvious.

Because in our traditional thinking, the consciousness of "women are virtuous but not talented" is deeply rooted in the bone marrow. Society requires mothers to be independent in the workplace and run their families in an orderly way.

However, Zhang Quanling hit the nail on the head with this false proposition, and vomited an evil spirit for working mothers.

Why should we demand women and tolerate men with a balance between career and family? Because of prejudice, this question itself is a great prejudice, and subconsciously we expect too much of women in the workplace.

Christina once said: As a professional woman, I need to make achievements and take care of my family.

I hope all mothers will be fearless fighters in the workplace, so as to compete with men; Be a gentle and boundless mother at home and leave a place for the soul to live.

Don't blame yourself if you can't do both. Mother is not a god, just an ordinary person. The rest of your life is long. Please be kind to yourself.