With the help of a 486 computer worth 535 yuan, he started to build his own website in a little over two years, and looked for hot forums everywhere to publish his "masterpiece". The result was booed, and the ID was seized again and again.
Even in the noisy network, his loneliness is obvious. And many people don't know what kind of life is connected behind this loneliness.
The room is full of advertising elements.
Zhang Bin's home is behind an easily overlooked door in the dark of the corridor. Pushing open the door panel, a voice came from the opposite side of the corridor full of debris: "Don't be afraid, come in."
This apartment, located near Xizhimen, Beijing, is a public house of Zhang Bin's mother's unit, and there is no need to pay rent. In addition, Zhang Bin's monthly meals and telephone charges for 200 yuan money are also borne by her mother. Mother has never been here since he moved in. She doesn't want others to know that she has such a son. But every few weeks, my mother will call Zhang Bin home for dinner and give him living expenses for next month.
Compared with the dilapidated corridor, the house is surprisingly neat. The room was not tidied up deliberately, and the walls around it were neatly plastered with slogans written in big red letters: "The great writer Zhang Bin signed books for sale". On a wooden partition beside the bed, there are books made by himself, and the paper cutter on the ground witnessed the birth of each book.
Zhang Bin sat in front of the computer between the cot and the window, with his back to us. The words "Great Writer Zhang Bin" are written on the white T-shirt. On the washed jeans, the same slogan was written: "Great Writer Zhang Bin" and "Bullshit Power Book".
Every corner here shines with the elements of advertising, but unfortunately the audience is often only one person, that is "the great writer Zhang Bin" himself.
A few minutes later, Zhang Bin began to get excited. He took out the plan of Walking with the Great Writer Zhang Bin, which detailed his schedule for a period of time in the future, and strongly suggested that we go together. He knows very well that he even believes in the power of the media. There is a sentence in his quotation: "What the media promotes will be popular in society." He wants to become rich and famous as soon as possible. Perhaps this is all people's potential desire, but Zhang Bin's expression is much more urgent than others, and this desire to get ahead was produced several years ago.
The "smelly repeater" in the university
1September, 1992, Zhang Bin was admitted to the Communication Department of Nanjing University of Posts and Telecommunications. At that time, there was only one enrollment quota for this major in Beijing, and it was not easy to get into it. Like all other college students, Zhang Bin started his college life with many dreams.
But only one month after school started, an accident changed him-because he went out to play without the teacher's approval on National Day and was asked to write a check (he and his classmates left a note for the teacher, but they didn't get the teacher's signature at that time? .
"I have never written a check, and I think it is a great insult to me." In order to avoid the teacher, he fled from the classroom to the library, and from Nanyou to Nanda, and never attended classes normally again. Half a semester passed quickly in hide-and-seek with teachers. By the end of the semester, he didn't get any grades, so he had to repeat the grade and became a "smelly repeat student" He stubbornly put "smelly" in front of repeat students as an attribute, because it is even more shameful for him to repeat a grade.
Having lost such a big face, he has to find a way to "turn over a new leaf". In the next few days, "I spent all day thinking about how to get ahead, how to make a lot of money, and how to save my face." During this period, he made many small inventions, made plans, and contracted a small auditorium next to the school to show movies to students. The result was very miserable.
In the eyes of the students around, Zhang Bin is actually the best among all Beijing students of Nanyou. He has a strong hands-on ability. At that time, it was very popular on campus to make small inventions and assemble stereos. What he makes is always better. He even won the Excellence Award in the invention competition organized by Radio magazine. According to his college classmates, "At that time, Zhang Bin didn't have his current beard. He was tall and thin, but he was actually a handsome young man."
Three years will soon be over, because he is always absent from class and fails a grade, so he can't graduate normally. Moreover, the "hateful" school informed his mother that she could not graduate. A year later, his mother was diagnosed with cancer. "Everyone thinks I made my mother angry." .
He failed the grade again, and the school arranged for him to go to the second grade with his classmates in the second grade. In this way, he studied in a three-year university for five years and didn't get a diploma.
From Zhang Bin to "Great Writer Zhang Bin"
"It is difficult to find a job without a college degree." Zhang Bin's first job after graduation was programming for a TV production company. "Because planning does not require a diploma, money comes quickly, and a planning can get tens of thousands or hundreds of thousands of commissions." But in the planning he made, the highest prize he got was only 1000 yuan, but he resigned soon.
He is obsessed with planning, and in his eyes, there will always be opportunities for planning in this world. Even when he was poor enough to make a living by washing toilets in hotels, he couldn't let go of his enthusiasm for planning. Brush the toilet during the day and write a plan at night. After working around the clock for a week, he gave the boss a plan on how to attract customers. As a result, the suggestion was not accepted and the job of washing the toilet was lost.
A college student with 7 years of marketing experience has read one of his planning cases and concluded that there is almost no possibility of actual operation. But Zhang Bin never doubted his ability in this respect: "They are jealous of talents and worried that I will do too well and take their place in the future."
Unsatisfactory work made his family no longer believe in him. The younger brother called him lazy: "People in their twenties are almost thirty years old, and they have to rely on a seriously ill mother to support them. They are shameless."
So he set up a stall selling thermometers and glow sticks. But at the same time, he began to think for himself. He wants to be famous. Zhang Bin became a "great writer" in an instant.
One night at 200 1, after selling a personal serial diary "The Story of a Hero or a Liar" at a stall for a day, Zhang Bin accidentally let out a cry on the small stone bridge: "The great writer Zhang Bin signed a book!" From then on, he found another reason to admit himself-"I am a great writer, and I want to sign books." And his titles are varied: Golden Sky, 27-year-old, The Power of Shit and so on.
Since then, in the name of "great writer Zhang Bin", he has frequently publicized his views on various online forums, and from time to time, he wears clothes with his name printed on them and "signs books" on an overpass in Beijing-although he may not be able to sell any.
A lonely life
Zhang Bin insisted on the principle that others should affirm themselves, and they should affirm themselves first. But it is undeniable that while "affirming himself", his happiness is limited to his own world.
Although his mother silently supported him, she never went shopping with him, nor did she take the initiative to visit him in his cabin. For several years, she has been telling her neighbors that her son works in the telecommunications bureau. Zhang Bin is afraid to see his younger brother, because he will be scolded as soon as he sees him. Even if I visit my mother occasionally, I will choose when my brother is away.
He has no friends, and he is almost alone in his life. It is difficult for him to remember the last time he talked face to face, and this loneliness may even cause his temporary aphasia. The internet has not brought much change to his life. Several times he thought he had found a friend, but the result always disappointed him.
A few years ago, there was a kitten named "Huahua Pig" as his companion, but it was later given away by his mother. Because sparrows often patronize, the windowsill of his house is more lively than that of other houses. Compared with his animal friends, there seems to be no one like him in real life.
He cherishes the rare opportunity to talk to people, whether others want to listen or not. "Give me another minute, let me finish this. Finally, someone talked to me and let me have a good time. " The tone is almost pleading.
When I was about to leave, I had already reached the stairs, and I heard a voice upstairs shouting, "I'll give you a set of all my books next time."
2- Acheng's surname is Zhong, and his real name is strange to most people. At first glance, you may think that he sells wonton, but this young master actually belongs to the imperial city.
The roots are pure and scattered, fighting chickens and walking dogs for fun. Acheng himself explained in the book that his parents were the People's Liberation Army who surrounded Beiping in those days, and they were named "Acheng" to commemorate the countryside around the city.
This statement is very interesting, from which it is not difficult to imagine that Acheng is an interesting person. He is not famous and has few works. In a few years, most of them will be forgotten by the public. And he hasn't written a long story, not even a novella.
Very few. But this does not prevent Acheng from becoming one of the first-class writers in China and becoming a "Montana" figure in Beijing dialect.
It is naturally difficult to become a "big winner" by writing articles. Highlights point to high yield
No, you have to have some aura. Otherwise, after one year, even if the novel is saved enough, it will always belong to Qiong Yao Haiyan, not first-class. Of course, there are many writers with aura, including Wang Xiaobo's cleverness and so on.
Su Tong's talent and amorous feelings, however, the cleverness of these people is in the eye, and everyone sees it.
Comparatively speaking, Acheng's aura is that kind of quiet and hidden, which is Lu Xun's poem.
It can be described as "listening to thunder in silence", and the metaphor is popular, as the saying goes, "a dog that bites doesn't bark." The tutor read his novels in his early years, without twists and turns, and the words were very concise.
I glanced at it in a hurry and didn't agree. But after thinking about it, I realized that Acheng's narrative is actually very meaningful and has a long aftertaste.
Simple and natural, this kind of writing is rare now. Generally speaking,
Shen Congwen, Wang Zengqi, Sun Li and Acheng are all top experts in this school. Their works are not long, but the words are carefully tempered. Unlike today's novelists, one hand is millions of words, and then look at the works.
The name also made our supervisor blush and beat his heart. After reading it, he can only say angrily like Ah Q: "Mom, I was cheated again!" " "
Acheng's thoughts are very mixed. I don't trust Marxism–Leninism.
Yes, anyway, he likes everything about Confucianism, Buddhism, Taoism and Zen. The general view is that he is closer to Taoism. Many critics believe that the novel mentioned above contains Taoist culture in China, and Wang Yisheng, the chess idiot in the book, still bears your mark.
Yes, he also plays Taoist chess and pays attention to attacking the enemy from behind. The character Wang Yisheng also embodies the highest ideal of Taoism everywhere. His attitude towards life is two words: "inaction", which seems weak. In fact,
Do nothing, do everything, and powerful opponents are defeated by him.
On Acheng and Taoism, Dr. Hu Heqing of East China Normal University has made a detailed analysis. Dr. Hu committed suicide by jumping off a building ten years ago, which once caused a sensation throughout the country.
I have forgotten it now. He has a well-written suicide note called Su Tong Ge Fei. In the year of his death, the supervisor specifically looked for it. I remember that several writers mentioned in the book are closely related to Taoism, such as Su Tong, Ge Fei and, of course, Acheng.
. Now that I think about it, it is. It's a pity that this book is long gone.
Many people like Acheng, but there are also serious criticisms, such as Kong, a doctor of literature. Mr. Kong wrote several articles specifically criticizing Acheng.
A copy. This book is a collection of some short stories of Acheng. It uses the writing method of ancient note novels, which is probably too much pursuit of washing and practicing. Therefore, there is basically no personal theme in the description of large paragraphs, which makes Kong unable to read.
I don't know. Acheng has been writing for a long time.
Not only Mr. Kong is dizzy, but I am also dizzy. For example, a few words: "It's evening, everyone is up, Sasha, put on your clothes." Kong Dong Qing criticized: "Is this an autumn night or a spring night? what
Is anyone up? What's that rustling sound? Who put on clothes again? I don't have a book and the quotation is not in the original text, so I remember the effect. )
Finally, talk about Acheng's essays. More famous are two series, one
It's called China's Novels and Philosophy. Smooth and interesting, it's worth reading. The other book is called some travel notes of his trip in Italy. He drew some venetian illustrations himself, and with his witty comments, it counts.
They complement each other.
Acheng likes to play, play with calligraphy, painting and antiques, and even assemble a car himself. Naturally, his travel notes are much better than yours. Lao Yu's swimming method is called "hardship", and he hasn't played it yet.
First of all, you should bring a box of reference books and prepare to write an eight-part essay. While Acheng is playing and playing, writing a few gadgets at will.
What did Lao Yu miss Acheng? I think it's just a "normal heart"
"Three words. Simply put, how many people can do it?
3- Derrida said I was just fighting myself. In the history of literature and thought, Lu Xun in our country once did this, as did Kant, Nietzsche, Schopenhauer and Foucault in Europe. I'm afraid there are very few people who do it again. Ironically, I tried to do this once, but failed. I am often defeated by myself. I am defeated in flying. Sometimes I even lose the courage and strength to fight again. But I just said to myself, stand up and continue fighting until I defeat myself, not myself.
In many people's lives, this may be a destination that can never be reached. But as long as life has not completely abandoned us, we need to work hard to get close to it. No, even if life abandons us, we can't give up. We still need to work harder towards it.
I wanted to say Zhu Tianwen, but somehow I started with Derrida. A writer is bound to be branded when he grows up, and his life's creation is just to find different decorations in this brand, and then carve them on his own skin to become a unique world. This is another form of fighting against yourself.
Zhu Tianwen's novels come from two worlds, which is a gorgeous space built by Hu Lancheng and Zhang Ailing. Needless to say, from Memories of Flowers and Childhood to Summer Capital and Magnificence at the End of the Century, Zhu Tianwen enjoys the cool in the shade of his grandparents. It was not until Notes of the Savage that the narrow door of her novel was opened. The emergence of "e-world" is really amazing and surprising. Suddenly found that novels can be written like this. As Wu He, a Taiwan Province writer, said, infatuation with things is the characteristic of her novels, but I think that not clinging to her original universe and trying to satisfy her desire to name her novels made Zhu Tianwen become "witch-obsessed". Zhu Tianwen's "Witch Time" and "Under the Glaze Blue" have been picking rare fruits in a witch's world since "The Story of the Savage", and they are colorful and freely blooming under the Taipei sky. She is also a witch, as if everything in her world had been enchanted and reassembled under her pen. The original DNA sequence was completely destroyed, and it was extracted under the high temperature fire of burning pottery. Finally, the fire was extinguished, and a new word dance sequence was obvious. The house of literary life was demolished and installed at will by her, and she is beginning to rebuild a house about novels that is different from the past. It is said that she is currently writing a novel "Yanwu", and the first sentence begins like this: Well, I once met an unaccompanied traveler. This sentence has aroused our endless desires. It's like the first time I saw the name of the movie "Stork", and I searched frantically for this disc in Nanjing until I found it.
Now think about it, who said that novels can't be written like this? Who stipulates that the world of novels cannot be maintained like this? Isn't that how creation begins? If all the thinking space is restricted by the existing rules, how can the needs of human spiritual society and cultural world continue to develop?
In the face of all excellent novels, any explanation and analysis are powerless. They cannot be copied, and every writer is different. But to sum up, it seems that in recent years, Taiwan Province and Hongkong writers are trying to explore the literary significance and order that really belongs to their personal space. This is a new voice different from mainland literature, but it is also a manifestation of the vigorous vitality of China literature. On the mainland, it seems that there is a Han Shaogong who is fighting for the order of novels. We will wait and see.
Attachment: Introduction of Zhu Tianwen
Zhu Tianwen, female, born in Linqu, Shandong Province, 1956 was born in Fengshan, Kaohsiung, Taiwan Province, and graduated from the English Department of Tamkang University. Born into a literary family, his father Zhu Xining has a novel "Iron Slurry"; Hu Lancheng, a private school teacher, was deeply influenced by it. His sister, Zhu Tianxin, is also a famous writer in Taiwan Province, who has written the book "Ancient Capital". He used to be the editor-in-chief of Sansan Episode and Sansan Magazine, and now he specializes in writing. He won the third place in the first novel award of United Daily News and the excellent short story award of the fifth China Literature Award. 1994, he won the first literary million-novel award of The Times for The Tale of the Savage. He has written many novels, essays and screenplays. Yanwu is a novel he is writing.