Lin, female, 22 years old, a third-year student majoring in forestry. Lin from the Northeast has been a forestry worker for generations, and he is very happy to go to the provincial capital to go to college. After arriving at school, he studied hard and got excellent grades. He was once rated as a three-good student in his freshman year. With the growth of age, the admiration for the opposite sex is increasing day by day, and I hope that a prince charming will appear as soon as possible. When she confessed to another boy in this major, she was politely rejected. During the winter vacation, she couldn't help but write another letter to the boy, but he invited his classmates back to school and left home, so his brother "accelerated" the letter to school intact. After the letter arrived at school, the students in the dormitory thought that something had happened at home and opened it. This matter was made public. As soon as the news came out, she was originally introverted and depressed, and her mood was heavier and her inner contradictions were more. For this reason, she is in a trance all day and can't sleep at night. She felt ashamed and did a shameful thing. Seeing her classmates talking and laughing together, she thought they were making fun of her, so she went forward to explain it to them, but she didn't understand it herself, causing a lot of trouble in the city. As a result, I often have a bad headache, feel chest tightness, can't concentrate on my studies, and finally have suicidal thoughts. After writing letters to department leaders, parents and classmates, she took a lot of sleeping pills. Because the teachers and classmates found it in time, they were sent to the school hospital for rescue.
Comments: After the courtship was rejected, Kobayashi was ashamed of his parents' behavior, his self-esteem was traumatized, and he became arrogant among his classmates, causing anxiety, depression and even suicide. In fact, she pursues her own love and bravely tells her true feelings to her lover. This is a bold pursuit of a better life. She is not wrong and should not blame herself. However, love is mutual. Everyone has the freedom to love and not to love. Not getting your own love doesn't mean losing all the love of the opposite sex. The world is full of grass, so why worry about others not knowing you? When Madame Curie 19 years old, she fell in love with a handsome and rich college student. Due to the opposition of family members, college students are unable to fight, which makes Madame Curie have to bear the pain of lovelorn. Madame Curie was also in pain at that time, but she immediately controlled her feelings rationally, lost her love without losing her ambition, concentrated all her energy on scientific research, made new scientific discoveries, and gained new love.
Case 2: When breaking up has become a reality.
Xiao E, female, age 19, a sophomore in a higher vocational college. I have been in pain for nearly a month. Sometimes I hit my head against the wall and even thought about suicide, but I still didn't have the courage to do that in the end. During the winter vacation, her boyfriend broke up with her, and she couldn't accept it. She felt very sad, helpless, unwilling and depressed. In my heart, I always think of their happy time together. Now in the face of his cold and decisive attitude, she can't believe it's true, and she always fantasizes that two people can make up. My heart is very bitter and tired, and I feel that I will collapse in a day or two, and I can't stand it any longer.
Comments: The sadness, pain, despair, melancholy, anxiety, nothingness and other emotions brought by lovelorn hurt the parties. Losing love is one of the most serious psychological setbacks in life. If the negative emotions caused by lovelorn love are not resolved in time, it will lead to physical and mental diseases. Lovelorn is a common setback in love, and many young people suffer from it. Little e should face the reality and accept the fact of breaking up, instead of blindly staying in past memories and beautiful fantasies; Carry out positive self-psychological adjustment, such as confiding with relatives or close friends, appropriately transferring emotions to other people or things, and learn to look at problems dialectically; Eliminate mental trauma as soon as possible and restore psychological balance and health.
Case 3: Behind the Broken Love
Xiao D, male, 22 years old, a fourth-grade engineering student. The student said that when he was studying a foreign language outside the school, he met a girl in our school. He was impressed with her and approached her on his own initiative. The girl is one year older than him and is already facing graduation. One day in mid-April, the news of grandma's death came suddenly, and he was heartbroken. He found the girl and told her and grandma about their childhood life and their maternal love for her. The girl was very moved and immediately expressed her desire to make friends with him. He seemed to have caught the lifesaver and immediately put all his feelings into it. In the future exchanges, his feelings became deeper and deeper, and he couldn't disappear for a day and didn't want to for a while. However, after the girl promised to make friends with him, she regretted it very much and felt that she was thoughtless. In particular, her father is very opposed to their communication, so she has repeatedly said that she wants to end this relationship. But he didn't agree to break off the relationship. He wrote a bloody book, saying that he would break his finger and commit suicide. He failed in the final exam because his mood was always in extreme fluctuation and he focused on dealing with their relationship. After graduation, the girl was assigned to work in the local area, saying that she could only be friends with him. I wish he would stop bothering her and return all the letters he gave her. On impulse, he went to the girl's unit and hit her. The girl and the unit leader found the school. He shed tears in public to show that he no longer associates with her. But he still felt that he really loved her, didn't want to lose her, and couldn't control his feelings. Especially on holidays, I often call and write letters, and even wait for the girl at her door or on her way to work. He knew that this would only make her farther away from him, and it would also violate his principle of being a man, but he couldn't help himself. Seeing that New Year's Day is approaching, my mood is even more uncontrollable. I'm afraid of making out-of-control behavior, and I'm even more afraid of getting red in the exam. Because he failed all eight courses and lost his degree, he couldn't graduate because there was something wrong with his graduation design last semester. He felt very painful and didn't know what to do.
Comments: Xiao D's emotional reaction after lovelorn is much stronger than that of ordinary people and lasts for a long time. It has been nearly half a year since the girl broke up with him, but he still can't control himself and is emotional, which has deeper psychological reasons. He didn't want to lose her, because he thought she was his first true lover, and he felt love and cherish for the first time after leaving his grandmother for more than ten years. Her love compensated him for years of emotional hunger and thirst. He is afraid of returning to his previous state and doesn't want to fail in love, so he has been persistent, hoping to save it. But instead of helping him get rid of his emotional entanglements, his actions will make him fall into a worse situation. Little d should be aware of his own problems, shift his energy to study and work, and get out of his inner world. He can't just immerse himself in the memories of the past and try to overcome himself.
Case 4: Self-mutilation due to lovelorn fingers.
Xiao K, male, 20 years old, a third-year student in a higher vocational college. He was in great pain when his girlfriend asked him to break up. One day at noon in the classroom, I stabbed a finger with a specially bought big kitchen knife. After the incident, I was sent to the hospital by my classmates and teachers in time for rescue.
Comments: In the face of the frustration and blow of lovelorn, instead of taking a positive way to adjust self-psychology, we take a negative and destructive way to deal with it, which not only does not help, but deepens the harm to ourselves, parents and relatives, and even causes a burden and influence to society. College students should treat lovelorn rationally, face it positively, treat it correctly and calmly, eliminate mental trauma as soon as possible, and maintain psychological balance and health.
Case 5: Campus violence caused by "rival in love"
Not long ago, Cui, a junior in Peking University Medical School, was hacked to death with a sharp weapon. The scene of the incident was in the teaching building of the South District of Beijing Millennium Monument Hospital. Afterwards, a classmate of the deceased was taken away by the police. It is understood that both of them have pursued the same girl before and fought for some festivals ... Comments: The emergence of campus violence is related to the social and cultural background. The pace of work and life is accelerating, and the overall speed of society is also accelerating. However, people's energy is limited, and the speed of keeping up with the pace of society is slow, which makes people feel impetuous and eager to succeed at once. Relatively speaking, the power of social moral restraint is weak. The destructive power accumulated by pressure from all sides is great. The fuse may be something that ordinary people look normal, but it is a big deal in his view. So when he feels hurt, he will be instinctively angry and attacked, but instead of venting in a socially recognized way, he is looking for an extreme behavior to vent, so he may have a violent tendency towards those who hurt him.
For teachers and students at school, it is necessary to strengthen psychological supervision, such as engaging in some activities that transform people's energy through normal channels. If both teachers and students have the concept of mental health, they can find out others' problems as early as possible and help them alleviate them, so it is possible to avoid extreme behavior. Case 16: Homosexuality kills boyfriend.
A boy in a university in Shenzhen killed another boy who was very close to him. According to the police investigation, his boy has a homosexual relationship with his boyfriend, while his boyfriend is bisexual and has a love relationship with another girl. The boy thinks that his boyfriend betrayed him and killed him in a rage, making a big mistake and irreparable!
Comments: Homosexuality, heterosexuality and bisexuality are considered as different sexual orientations. Homosexuality among college students tends to pursue relatively stable feelings and sexual life. The boy in this case took excessive actions because he discovered the "betrayal" of his gay boyfriend, which caused bad consequences.