0 1 has hard power.

A person who has no ability and is not excellent in all aspects must find it difficult to be confident.

Self-confidence is not hard power, but it often needs to be built on the basis of hard power.

We rarely see the confidence of a person with poor grades, and we rarely see the confidence of a small and transparent workplace, but we will see many schoolmasters and elites in the workplace.

This is because Xueba and the elite in the workplace have hard power that Xuezha and Xiaobai don't have. He can solve problems that others can't do, and he can also solve problems that others can't solve, so confidence comes into being.

Therefore, self-confidence is not groundless, but attached to hard power.

For us ordinary people, if we don't have a good father and a mine at home, or

If you want to be confident, you must break the record and have a bad figure.

It is necessary to learn hard skills honestly, and it is more reliable to study knowledge and skills hard.

If you are a student, the most important thing now is to study hard. Studying hard is not only to get good grades, but also to build up self-confidence among peers and prove that you are not worse than others.

As a newcomer in the workplace, working hard and improving one's ability is not only to earn more money or please the leaders, but to gain a foothold in the workplace. This is the foundation of survival and the source of self-confidence.

So, if you have hard skills, do you have confidence?

02 others' approval

We often see that some people are very capable. They have studied well and worked well since childhood, but they are not confident.

This is actually because he received too little recognition, or maybe he grew up in a very bad environment.

I have a student who is particularly outstanding. He has been a gifted and clever man since he was a child. I was admitted to Peking University more than ten years ago, but I finally gave up halfway.

In a sharing, I was able to understand her experience.

It turns out that when she was young, her mother was very demanding of her. She won the first place in the exam and was seldom praised. She didn't get the first place in the exam, so she just waited for criticism.

This leads to the fact that even if she is excellent, it is difficult to have self-confidence, and you have been holding the whole person for a while.

With this rebellious attitude, she was admitted to Peking University, but in the end she refused to go to Peking University.

Because in her opinion, going to Peking University is not her goal, just to fight back against her mother: "Look, with my strength, I can get into Peking University, but I can't!"

Because she was not sure since she was a child, even though she was smart and excellent, what she did and learned, she never felt confident in essence, and even fell into severe depression.

Therefore, if a person's Excellence is not seen and recognized, especially if it is not appreciated by people who are particularly close, it is still difficult to establish inner self-confidence.

Maybe everything is beautiful to others, but in fact his heart is depressed and lacking.

Self-confidence is a special magical thing, which is invisible, intangible, inseparable and inseparable, but it is the source of vitality in life.

Then, with hard power and others' affirmation, can you become confident?

03 Equality of personality

Another situation is that some people have good conditions in all aspects and have been affirmed by many people.

But in a love relationship, you will feel particularly insecure, and even lower yourself because of inferiority, and please each other unconditionally.

For example, two years ago, Bao Li, a girl from Peking University, was obviously a smart and excellent girl, who wanted to look good and have a degree, and finally her boyfriend PUA died.

It's really embarrassing! Why on earth is this?

I believe many girls have read Pride and Prejudice, which is even called the textbook of love and marriage. Even though it has been 200 years since its birth, the concept of love advocated in the book is not outdated at all.

Elizabeth, the hostess, came from a gentry family, well-off and plain. Darcy was born in a noble family, rich and powerful, tall and handsome.

In Britain 200 years ago, two people were made for each other, so they were not a good match. A girl marries not only because of her personality and behavior, but also because of her money.

Obviously, Elizabeth is not rich. According to the standards of that era, she did not have the advantage of marrying into a rich family.

But we can see from these two things that she is a truly confident girl.

The first thing is to resolutely refuse to accept Gao Fushuai Darcy's love.

On one occasion, Darcy confessed to Elizabeth that although Gao Fushuai's courtship was sincere and warm, the sense of superiority revealed in his words was unacceptable to Elizabeth, who had a particularly strong self-esteem, and almost refused without thinking.

This made the confident rich boy never expect that after all, he was born in a noble family and his own conditions were outstanding, and he did not expect that he would be severely rejected when he showed his love to the girl!