Spring outing 1 Comment on the composition of You Wu Town
Content: The introduction is concise and distinct, and the description of Wuzhen people and environment also captures the characteristics. The last paragraph is very good, lively, interesting and attractive.
Overall comments: There are many students who travel during the summer vacation and many who write travel notes. This article should be regarded as more distinctive. The little author has a good ability to summarize things, and he can always grasp the characteristics to describe them, so that readers are very interested in reading. I hope to keep it up and write better works!
The first day of visiting the West Lake
Content: The text at the beginning is more like a diary than a composition. The beginning of the composition is very important. I suggest not to be so casual.
General comment: This is a travel note, and the author describes the process of visiting the scenic spot of West Lake in a more vivid way. The works are interesting and easy to read. However, travel notes are not simply described in sequence, and it is easy to become a running account. Young writers can focus on the description of "three pools reflecting the moon" in their compositions, and make some weak descriptions of other parts, which can make the articles coherent.
Youxianlin University Town
Content: The word "gone with the wind" is well used, which not only conforms to the characteristics of red scarf, but also reflects the relaxed and happy mood of students. This paragraph of language is concise and clear, and it has substance in words. This paper briefly describes the gains of the second study tour. The young author quickly applied the scientific vocabulary he learned to his composition, and imagined the development of science, which is enough to show his attitude of loving science. The little author showed his observation and understanding of the library and benefited a lot from his big brother and sister, which was very good.
Overall comment: The whole article reads very smoothly, describes the three occasions of "Biology Museum", "Science Museum" and "Library" in chronological order, and briefly expounds the knowledge and feelings I have learned, which is really amazing! The tone of the article is smooth and the structure is clear. It is not difficult for us to see that the little author is meticulous in thinking and has good language control ability. Although the article is not long, I believe the author has experienced a wonderful and profound trip to Xianlin University Town! I also hope that the young author can explore more unique insights in his life!
Qingdao seaside tour
Content: The content describes the calm and surging sea, and the author compares the sea to "blue gem" and "runaway wild horse" respectively, which is more appropriate.
General comment: The article describes an experience of the little author who went to Qingdao to see the sea. The article is fluent, imaginative and vivid, and his love for the sea is revealed between the lines. Some places (such as chatting with mom on the way, how to play with sand, etc.). ) It's better to be more specific.
Travel Notes of Quarrying
Content:
The beginning explains the time, place, people and events, so that readers can have a general grasp of the content of this article.
The sentence "Don't get too excited" is a bit colloquial, so it is suggested to modify it.
"Looking at the Yangtze River only" expresses the surging mood of young authors in the face of the rolling Yangtze River water, which is expressed in poetry and shows the daily reading accumulation of young authors.
It can be seen that the little author is a cheerful and very active "little tour guide".
The order of underlined sentences can be rearranged, which will be more smooth: "The great romantic poet Li Bai once recited poems here many times, leaving many unfortunate chapters".
The use of idioms is very appropriate, which shows the accumulation of this little author on weekdays.
Fully express the excitement of climbing and overlooking with poetry. Speak your mind and express your unforgettable feelings about this trip to Caishiji.
Overall opinion:
The article systematically describes the experience of a one-day trip to Caishiji, showing the young author's nostalgia and unforgettable feelings.
According to the order of the tour, the author described the landscapes of Qidu, Taibailou, Sanyuan Cave and Guangji Temple in turn, highlighting the characteristics of different landscapes and revealing the novel feelings of the scenery and experiences along the way.
It is worth mentioning that it is really rare for a young writer to express his feelings in many poems. I hope you can continue to refuel!
Spring outing 2 1 composition review. Spring is rich and beautiful: red flowers, green grass, green hills and blue sky. ...
2. The quiet picture is full of vigor and vitality. The beauty of nature is quiet and dynamic-both are beautiful. What if there is no dynamic? So think again.
When describing the scenery, I wrote my own experience and expressed my inner feelings. For example, the surprise of finding the first grass sprouting, the excitement of seeing swallows nesting under their own eaves, the admiration of smelling the fragrance of peach blossoms, and the joy of hearing the teacher announce a spring outing are all inner feelings. While describing the scenery, properly expressing inner feelings and even associations will make the practice more vivid and real, and will also touch others.
4. Write what you see, hear, smell and feel about the beauty of spring into your exercise, so that your exercise is as vivid and beautiful as spring!
Flying kites is children's favorite activity, and the fun is self-evident. Through detailed description, the colorful flying scenes of kites in the sky are displayed.
6. Looking at your homework, let us see a lovely and innocent childlike innocence.
7. Grasping the different characteristics of grass, trees and flowers in spring, according to the order of "",it depicts the vibrant scene of spring, reflecting a person's heartfelt joy.
8. Write characteristics, write new ideas and beautiful scenery-natural beauty; Beauty of human nature-lovely and naive beauty.
9. Writing scenery captures the characteristics of scenery and describes the blending of scenery, from far to near, from surface to point, and handles it in an orderly way. The articles written are more coherent, and the scenery has different shapes and colors, which captures the modeling characteristics.
10, this passage has a general description, a specific description, a dynamic and static, and writes the loveliness of "". Take care of the exercises before and after, observe them carefully and write down your favorite feelings.
Spring outing essay review 3 1, the opening is concise, concise and orderly; Focus on description ... leave a deep impression on people
2. The beginning is quite innovative, taking the scenery as a metaphor; Flashback the beginning and render the artistic conception
It is also a way of writing to go straight to the subject from the beginning.
4. The beginning is very lively. The use of personification makes the beginning look vivid.
5. Ask questions at the beginning to attract readers.
6. Go straight to the subject at the beginning, which makes people clear at a glance.
7. At the beginning of the topic, the text is very attractive.
8. The description of the scene and atmosphere adds a lot of color to the article;
9 ..... Briefly describe the highlights; Link local work with overall work.
10, briefly introduce the situation, and naturally transition to the next paragraph;
1 1, the situation description causes suspense;
12, make full use of language, action and psychological description to make things concrete and vivid.
13, briefly describe the antecedents and pave the way.
14. Dialogue or some psychological description can be added to this part.
15, it is more appropriate to change … to ….
16, naturally connecting the preceding with the following, and the detailed description highlights the quality of the characters and is touching.
17. Write a scene in the narrative to compare people with each other.
18, personified language makes the article more vivid.
19, the shape description is very interesting, highlighting that the lovely introduction ... is integrated with one's own thoughts and is infectious.
20. It is very vivid to use the method of giving examples in a column diagram.
2 1, the transition is natural, and each paragraph is clearly explained.
22. This part refers to the examples in the text. The language is too flat, so it can be modified appropriately to make it more vivid.
23. The beauty of … can be vividly written by using rhetorical devices such as metaphor and personification. This section can also be expanded to show …
24. Metaphorical sentences are well used and full of charm when they are linked with ancient poems.
In sharp contrast to, stand out from.
26. It is impressive that primary school students can have such an experience.
27, the end is a bit sudden and exaggerated.
28. The ending was simple and touching.
29. The ending is equally interesting.
30, the end of the echo should be the beginning, the structure is complete.
3 1, judging from the scene, the ending is natural.
32, figurative image, appropriate, wonderful ending can be described as the finishing touch.
33. It seems that the ending is not over yet. It should be able to observe carefully and start vividly.
34. The end echoes the title and points out the center.
35. The beginning of the article is simple and appropriate, and the mood of the characters is set off by describing the environment. Very artistic, miscellaneous but not chaotic, can be meticulous and decent. It focuses on the end of the article, with simple and profound language and thought-provoking.
36. Starting with emotion and ending with emotion make the article coordinated and coherent, and at the same time, it can repeat the theme of the article, which is very infectious.
37, full of passion, describes ..., the beginning is concise, the focus is prominent, the details are appropriate, and the content is specific.
38. The article fully and appropriately exaggerates the atmosphere of … and gives a detailed and vivid description of the key points of the article, which is amazing.
39 ... is both practical and contains simple and profound philosophy, which is both exciting and emotional to read.
The close-up of ... is unique and interesting. The full text is full of childlike innocence and is very kind to read.