As an educator, no one wants to fall into the busyness, triviality, disorder and exhaustion of education, and everyone wants to live an ideal, valuable and fulfilling educational life.
Living a happy and complete educational life is a beautiful vision created for us by Professor Zhu Yongxin, a leading figure in education.
A good relationship is a good education. "The problem is still his father" and the family education expert President Zhan Danian have planned a clear and practical experience for us.
I was very lucky to open the "Principal's Think Tank" and listen to Chairman Zhang Zhan's speech "Good relationship is good education".
At the beginning, President Zhan cited a case of a child from a single-parent family in a key senior high school.
According to the case, he looked at the essence through the appearance and found that the single-parent family has two incompleteness: the family structure is incomplete and the family function is incomplete. The incomplete structure is obvious at a glance, but the latter point is often ignored. When talking about the insufficiency of family functions, President Zhan listed the functions of production, childbirth and life, support, upbringing, recreation, protection, discovery and education in one breath, and these functions are just the conditions needed to help children grow up.
Such children (single-parent families, lack of complete emotional comfort, insecurity, sensitivity, fragility and inferiority) find it difficult to vent their emotions at school because of the pressure of study in key high schools (and dare not vent all kinds of emotions at school), so they go home and beat and scold their mothers (this may be the only lifeline he can rely on), smash things, and even run away from home. This will lead to the breakdown (disintegration) of family relations and even the split (disintegration) of children's personality. Excuse me, in this case, can the mother be free from anxiety and pain?
He gave another example: the child was criticized against the teacher at school, and then the teacher drove him to another school.
This situation is very common. To understand where the confrontation between teachers and students began, students' emotional problems have not been paid attention to and solved. If teachers can find and pay attention to it in time, there will be no problem of the lack of subject dignity (President Zhan is an expert and can see through the essence behind the phenomenon at once, while students are ignored, which means the lack of subject dignity).
Students will have emotional problems when they are frustrated and need to find an exit. For example, they will pick up cups and smash them. The cup is innocent, just being taken as a scapegoat. Opposing the teacher is nothing more than students wanting to declare their subject existence (need to be seen), and it is understandable for children to do so.
Generally speaking, in the face of this situation, children will have two choices, one is to give in (having to be a passive receiver) and the other is to be tolerant (being a mainly responsible receiver). At this time, if parents don't understand the child and mistakenly position the child as the recipient, the child will become more and more resistant to the teacher (because they can't get empathy and understanding, they will feel more and more isolated).
The problems reflected in the above two cases are-
Our education lacks a children's perspective and is only beneficial to adults.
Why do you say that?
Parents are tortured badly by their children, but they don't think about where the children's pain is and where the root causes are. They will not consider how to solve their children's problems first, but pay attention to their own interests (face)-children don't want to go to school, so they are extremely anxious; If the child's grades are not good, he will get angry in a hurry, which reflects that my interest has been affected, indicating that I can't teach or educate my children. This is all because their own interests have been affected, anxiety and pain.
This also reflects another more serious problem-
Cultivate "people" in the mode of cultivating "talents"
Education is not only to cultivate talents, but also to cultivate people.
Many times, people only see talents, no one. In such an increasingly updated era, talents can be eliminated, but people cannot be eliminated (this is dehumanizing and contrary to people-oriented). After all, they are all parents' children and treasures in their hands.
There are only "talents" in their eyes, and they often ignore the existence of children, infringe on their interests, and ignore their personal needs at the moment.
Think about it, how many families, how many classes, such things are reflected in different degrees, different versions of the classroom, the back is cold, the heart is bleeding!
If I hadn't been lucky enough to hear such a lecture, I would still be too busy to touch the chicken feathers.
Chairman Zhan went on to point out that-
No matter how education changes, the object of education will not change, or people; The theme of education will not change, in order to meet the needs of human development; The principles of education will not change, but relationships will arise and education will take place.
No matter how the teaching materials change, how the education changes and how the educational environment changes, the subject of education will always be people, in order to meet the development needs of people. If this premise is ignored, children's pain as individuals, their hesitation and their plight may be submerged in the group, and problem students will easily arise.
We usually only see the result-the child has a problem, but we don't know how to trace it back to the source. When we see which part of the process has a problem, we think it's ok to kill the goose that lays the golden egg.
Sad husband!
President Zhan said that the problem students have neither moral mistakes nor behavioral mistakes, only because of improper education, the children's problems can not be solved in time, leading to depression, and even depression! In fact, these children are the weak! They are victims of the extinction of personalized education!
This is a voice that inspires the deaf, and this sentence hits the heart of parents and teachers (a person with more layout education).
After listening to the report of 1/3, I have deeply understood why President Zhan is called "the father of problem children". This is the real love for children, the real love to find, find and solve problems from the perspective of children!
I understand it more and more. On weekdays, in addition to working hard and bowing, you need to look up and listen to the words of some experts.
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