Because I envy other children riding bicycles, I have been clamoring for my mother to take her out to school.
One weekend afternoon, under the protection of her mother, she began to ride slowly downstairs.
At first, she rode smoothly. However, when she passed a small slope, she accidentally fell down and immediately began to cry sadly. Then she lost her temper and got emotional. Nobody touched it.
Her mother taught her to step hard on her left foot and walk around her right foot easily, and instructed her how to pedal over the ramp.
With the help of her mother, she rode more and more steadily, but she was still careful where there was a ramp, fearing that she could not get through.
Things were once deadlocked.
Fortunately, Xinxin is a stubborn person. After a struggle, she wanted to try again. She thinks she can.
She adjusted her mood and insisted on doing it herself, so her mother let her try.
After several rounds, Xiao Xinxin finally passed the ramp smoothly.
After that, even if she encounters more difficulties, she will use her brain to find a way to solve them.
Xinxin's first road to learning to drive passed the test perfectly.
Children's frustration education is really a long and arduous task. According to the survey conducted by the personality development research group of the only child in China, 32.5% children are afraid of difficulties, 34.2% children are timid and obedient, 20.4% children have poor self-care ability, and 19.5% children think they can't stand setbacks.
Ma Mei thinks that proper frustration education is very necessary for a child's healthy growth. So I usually pay special attention to this aspect of education.
Recently, Ma Mei published a great picture book called After Mr. Egg Fell.
Among the famous nursery rhymes Mother Goose, there is a short story called Humpty Dumpty. Mr. Egg fell from a high wall, and even the king's soldiers and horses could not make him recover.
Because this nursery rhyme is so famous, Cadic gold medal winner Dan Santer turned it into an inspirational story.
Life is long and "wrestling" is inevitable, but those who dare to wrestle face to face have the opportunity to stand up again.
Let's see how Mr. Egg, who is afraid of heights, overcomes his fear and himself.
Everyone calls me Mr. Egg.
High walls. This is my favorite place.
I know it's strange for an egg, but I just like being close to birds.
Then, one day, I fell (which made me famous).
People call it "big autumn", which sounds a bit remarkable.
It was just an accident, but it changed my life.
Fortunately, people in Kings Town managed to make me better.
Well, it has generally recovered.
Where there is really no way to recover, just wrap it with glue and bandage.
From that day on, I began to be afraid of heights.
Because of fear, I can't enjoy some of my favorite foods.
Walking by the wall every day, I want to climb that ladder again.
I really miss those birds and want to stay high in the city.
Maybe I will never do that again … because I know there will be accidents.
I can only make do with standing on the ground and observing the birds.
Although it feels very different, it is better than doing nothing.
One day, an idea flashed by.
Flying is more difficult than I thought.
Easy to cut, easy to scrape.
Nevertheless, I still insist on doing this every day ... I am doing it. ...
Finally, I succeeded.
My plane is perfect. I can fly freely.
I haven't been so happy in a long time.
Although I can't fly with the birds in the air, I feel very similar.
Unfortunately, an accident happened. ...
Always like this.
I almost left again.
But I thought about how much time I spent flying and everything I missed, and I finally decided to climb that wall.
But the higher I climb, the more nervous I get.
I hate to admit it. I feel horrible.
I dare not look up,
I dare not look down.
I just kept crawling,
Climb step by step ...
Finally, I'm not afraid anymore.
Perhaps, you won't see me as that "smashed" egg now.
I hope you remember that I am the one who stood up again. ...
..... learned to fly eggs.
There will always be some accidents in life, and after the accident, there will naturally be psychological fear of such accidents.
When this kind of traumatic accident happens, how can we overcome our fears?
Only when you are full of longing and courage for your dreams can you stand up again after falling down, and you will have a more exciting life after standing up again, just like Mr. Egg in the picture book story.
After a big fall, Mr. Egg became famous. With the help of the residents of King Town, he found his body, wrapped in bandages, of course.
Physical wounds can be healed, but spiritual wounds take time. Mr. Egg never dares to climb high again. He couldn't even climb up his old bed, so he had to sleep on the floor.
But Mr. Egg still yearns for the feeling of standing on a high place, and still envies that birds can fly freely. He tried his best to make himself a paper plane to comfort himself, because the paper plane made up for his regret that he couldn't go up high.
It's a pity that the plane hangs on the high wall, which is the high wall from which Mr. Egg fell. what can I do?
Do you want to take the paper plane down? Mr. Egg hesitated, hesitated. ...
Finally, his persistence in paper airplanes and his yearning for flying overcame his fear of heights. After climbing for a long time, he finally stood on the high wall again.
This time, he was no longer afraid. He enjoys the breeze and bright sunshine on high places, leaving his fears behind.
At this time, he opened his arms, broke out of his shell and became a free-flying bird.
The core content of this story is "trauma".
In life, everything from car accidents, serious diseases and the death of loved ones to insults, abuse and maltreatment is trauma.
After a traumatic event, people are usually nervous, scared, angry, helpless or temporarily numb. These reactions can evolve into stress disorder with the development of time, let the trauma accompany him all his life and sink deeper and deeper in the abyss of pain, but they can also become an opportunity for post-traumatic growth and become a better self.
The key to the two different results lies in the attitude of the traumatic experience in the face of trauma.
Paying attention to the response to problems and facing and describing traumatic events in a constructive way are helpful to the growth after trauma.
After experiencing a low ebb, Mr. Egg in the story decided to make a paper plane to make up for his regret that he couldn't climb high.
This production process is his way of self-healing.
When he faced the challenge of climbing again, his recovery process gave him great confidence. Because he worked so hard to get the paper plane, he was reluctant to throw it away.
Such inner strength inspired him and helped him stand on the high ground again. This is how Mr. Egg came out of the trauma and realized his post-traumatic growth.
The greatest beauty of this story lies in telling children such a truth with warm pictures:
Pain is not terrible, just stand up again in the face of him.
Compared with preaching and material compensation, this way will resonate with children.
Maybe the children don't know what pain is and what self-growth is, but after reading Mr. Egg's story, the children invented a toy for themselves and healed themselves in the game with reference to Mr. Egg's practice. This is the magic of picture books for children.
In order to echo this theme, the author's control of light and shadow also accurately describes Mr. Dan's mental journey.
At the beginning of the picture book, Mr. Egg has been walking in the shadow, and the sky is gray. When he climbed the high wall again, the bright sunshine on the high wall was in sharp contrast with the shadow under the high wall, suggesting that he was reborn.
Another ingenious place is that the author keeps switching perspectives.
During Mr. Egg's low tide, the author used a third-party perspective to organize the picture, but after Mr. Egg started making paper planes, the perspective was switched to the "Mr. Egg" perspective.
This method, on the one hand, sets off Mr. Egg's inner conflict, on the other hand, it also brings readers closer to the story and is more likely to resonate.
There will always be some accidents in life, and setbacks are excellent opportunities for growth.
As parents, we should also boldly put down the "umbrella".
True love for children is not over-protection, but moderate letting go.
If you really love your child, you can accompany him, stare at him and be nervous about him, but don't hold him tightly with your hands.
Trust him, give him a chance to take risks and make him strong in his own attempt.
Don't avoid the setbacks that children should have in their growth journey. Setbacks in growth are the greatest wealth.
Life needs setbacks, face them correctly, and allow children to make mistakes and fail.
I think the real frustration education is that we give our children enough love, understanding and encouragement to guide them to face setbacks with positive strategies and finally overcome them.
Only such children will be more frustrated and brave, and then sublimate the "big fall" into a new life.