Chatting with friends during the National Day, she talked about the fierce competition in education in Beijing, and some children finished primary school courses in kindergarten; Some primary schools finish school after one o'clock in the afternoon, so that children can have more time to go to extracurricular classes until eight or nine in the evening. ...

I can't help shivering at the thought that my baby is still experiencing pinyin and writing.

I trembled and continued to ask, "I'm afraid such fierce competition has become a tradition in the highland of education." What happened to the children who were trained according to this rhythm before? Has it always been so powerful? "

My friend shook his head: "I had dinner with the teacher of XX University (Liu Ding University) some time ago. He said that the psychology department of this university ranks first in the country, and one of the important reasons is that there are too many cases of students' psychological problems here ... "

Hugo Award winner Hao once shared his experience:

As the kind of person who is born with superior IQ and has a pleasant journey under the mechanism of fierce competition in real society, she often feels anxiety and pain that cannot be solved. She has given several lectures on this topic, and there are always many people who are equally confused to reveal similar feelings to her after the lecture.

In fact, both students admitted to XX University and Hao-style people are already "successful people" in the eyes of ordinary people;

More children with similar experiences may not have reached the time node of "going to college" and have been weak in the follow-up.

02

After finishing all the primary school courses in kindergarten, this kind of early super-running is not a little bit.

There are basically two ways to do this:

First, the child itself is gifted and radiant, and is a natural prodigy;

Second, parents try their best to encourage others. This is an artificial prodigy.

Either way, there is no reference value for the growth of Puwa.

Among the first generation of natural prodigies in New China, Ningbo, which made a sensation more than 40 years ago, can stand in the C position. How emotional is it? The first juvenile class of the Chinese University of Science and Technology was established because of him.

At the age of 2, I can recite a lot of poems and songs; When I was 4 years old, I could know hundreds of Chinese characters. 5 years old, can learn the introduction of traditional Chinese medicine; At the age of 8, he can play chess with the premier of the country and be familiar with classic Chinese studies; At the age of 9, he can prescribe medicine, diagnose illness and recite poems. At the age of 65,438+03, I was famous all over the world. ...

Later, he got tired of learning and began to be withdrawn.

Later, Ningbo once again appeared in people's field of vision because it fled into an empty door as a monk.

Two other prodigies in Ningbo's class, one named Xie Yanbo, disappeared after falling out with his tutor completely; The other is a politician who suffers from mental illness.

Natural prodigies are like this. What about artificial prodigies?

Looking at the prodigy who has been all the rage in recent years, it is not difficult to find many problems in its appearance and subsequent development.

03

Of course, these examples are typical.

Because the child went to the early transition class, the first grade went smoothly, so he came to the conclusion that as long as he kept ahead, it would always go smoothly. Until he reached the peak of his life, became CEO, married Bai, and became an out-and-out winner in life.

However, this is only a wishful assumption.

In the 1970s, in order to train more talents, the German government planned to train a group of children with higher intelligence from kindergarten, and began systematic knowledge learning from an early age.

However, before the implementation of this plan, the government funded a study: 50 kindergartens mainly focusing on knowledge learning and 50 kindergartens mainly playing games were selected, and then the children of the two groups were tracked and compared for a long time.

At the beginning of primary school, children in knowledge-based kindergartens are better, parents are relaxed and children are confident; After the fourth grade of primary school, the children who come out of the kindergarten playing games overtake directly, which has obvious advantages.

Coincidentally. During the same period, scholars in Michigan, USA, selected children from 68 families for follow-up study. They divided these children into "knowledge learning group" and "game playing group". In order to ensure the authenticity of the results, researchers insist on regular visits to prevent these families from "opening small kitchens" for their children privately, which will affect the reliability of the results until the children grow up to 23 years old.

The results are strikingly similar to the German research: children's advantages in the early knowledge learning group will not last long.

Moreover, American researchers have made a new discovery: children in the knowledge learning group are not good at getting along with others, have a shorter temper and are more likely to commit crimes.

04

Why is the influence of advanced learning on children different from what we think?

I want to share two real cases with you.

When I was exercising in the kindergarten, two children caught my attention:

The first child is very different.

Once I went to this kid's class to listen. When it comes to group activities, the other children are all in groups of four or five, and they are all discussing the questions raised by the teacher enthusiastically. Only children sit alone in the corner, indifferent to all this.

I walked over and accosted him: "Why don't we discuss it with other children?"

At first, the child was indifferent to my appearance, simply lowering his head and writing quickly on a piece of white paper; After writing almost a page, he stopped and gave me a white look: "Gee, boring." That look, it's nothing like a five-year-old child.

After class, I communicated with his class teacher. The teacher said that this child is usually like this. He is not interested in any activities, nor does he take part in them. He just wants to sit there and do math problems or write.

I was surprised: "Did he bring his own questions?"

"No, he gave himself a question, which was arranged horizontally and vertically."

Later, I paid more attention to him and found that he never played with other children. Even outdoors, he was alone and taciturn.

I asked the director about the child's family. The director said that the child's grandfather is a senior science teacher in middle school. He taught his children to write and calculate from an early age and began to learn knowledge as soon as possible.

The director said meaningfully, "We should respect the individual differences of each child. Some children are really gifted. Only in terms of children's socialization, we can only guide, not force. "

But the children we cultivate, in addition to intellectual development, must always become a complete social person!

The other child can't see any difference from children of the same age at all.

I can notice him because I saw a set of building blocks he put up in the construction area.

As the epidemic has just eased, kindergarten activities should be related to the epidemic. The teacher of this class printed out the photos of the Yellow Crane Tower in Wuhan and posted them in the construction area for the children to use as a reference when engaging in regional activities.

There is a child in this class who especially likes building blocks. His favorite choice is the building area. During this time, he specializes in the Yellow Crane Tower. Sometimes he cooperates with his friends, sometimes his friends go to other areas, and he ponders here himself. If you don't do it well once, come again next time. If you are not satisfied this time, you can revise it next time.

In this way, after two weeks, I finally turned my original small tower into a magnificent "Yellow Crane Tower" and expanded the original single-family building into a complex.

More importantly, he can think independently and pay attention to details: in addition to the steps and pillars supporting the building, he also shows the characteristics of the eaves of the Yellow Crane Tower with triangular building blocks; Even creatively add large particles of Lego into wooden building blocks to express the "cornices and arches" of ancient buildings, or even simply spell out another archway with Lego.

Seeing this, I think everyone may have some answers in their hearts:

Writing and arithmetic can make children learn in primary school, and it will be easier to learn;

However, after a certain age, it is difficult for activities such as using one's hands and brains, using one's eyes and heart, playing games, creating, thinking and improving, and communicating and cooperating with others on this basis to occur naturally and easily.

Many parents and friends ask: I know that the older a child is, the more he has to fight for thinking ability, and the thinking ability should be cultivated from an early age. So how can we improve children's thinking ability?

A large number of early childhood education research has long told us:

Games are children's nature. Games are a way for children to learn.

Children think independently in the game and constantly optimize and upgrade their thinking ability in thinking.

It's a pity that the improvement of thinking ability is a long-term process, far from the rapid improvement of the score of doing problems and brushing papers.

05

My mother planted a pumpkin in the small garden. It leaves in spring, blooms in summer and bears fruit in autumn.

Everything has its laws of growth and development. Things are like this, how can people compare?

Talking about "core education" with friends. The core of core education is the educated themselves, the children themselves and the law of their own growth and development.

It is also the law that we should follow.

Otherwise, even if we forcibly "go against the sky", most of us will only fall into a "strong twist melon", which is not sweet at all.

It is not that knowledge-based learning is not important, nor that parents do not need to pay attention to their children's growth; But for children to grow up, the most meaningful thing should be:

Do the right thing at the right time.

Protect the child's inner strength, he will overcome gravity and go to the sun;

Just like those flowers that look delicate and soft, but grow tenaciously all their lives.

Write at the end:

If a child is the seed of a big tree, he will naturally grow into a big tree;

If a child is the seed of a flower, he will naturally be full of flowers.

As parents, we can only provide the sunshine and rain needed for growth, rather than changing our own attributes.

Apple trees can bear sweet fruits, and roses can produce bright flowers;

These oak trees can't do it, but they can grow thick and tall, covering the sky.

Comparing one's own children with others' children will inevitably lead to anxiety;

But comparing children's today with yesterday, we are often gratified.

The greatest achievement of an old mother is nothing more than calmly and firmly letting her children grow into the best self.