The teacher said to you: Dear parents, I hope that after reading the book "Don't lose in family education", I will give you a benign help in family education concepts and family education behaviors, so that your children can become real beneficiaries. This is our greatest original intention and wish as teachers. Please read it carefully!
Questions you need to think about and answer: Please read carefully page 136- 137 of this book, and talk about how to make children dare to admit their mistakes in combination with the reality of you and your children.
Children's ability to distinguish right from wrong is poor, and it is inevitable to do something wrong. Severe lessons and criticisms may harden the relationship between parents and children. At this time, parents should patiently and meticulously reason with their children according to their level of understanding, point out their wrong behavior, show that he has violated the rules or hurt others' feelings because of his wrong behavior, and emphasize that he must take responsibility for the consequences of his wrong behavior and make remedial measures. And clearly show your attitude towards lies to your child, hoping that he will be an honest child and so on. Parents should not let their children do anything wrong, but must deal with it seriously. Be sure to strictly point out what children should do and what they can't do, and give necessary punishment according to the severity of their mistakes, so that children can realize the unhappiness caused by doing something wrong and remember the lessons. Mistakes that deliberately cause damage to children should not be allowed to develop. It is necessary to realize that children's bad habits are not formed in a day or two, so education also needs a long process, and it is not urgent to help children gradually understand the truth and learn self-respect and self-discipline. For example, parents can reduce and control the frequency of children's bad behaviors by giving them unpleasant nonverbal stimuli, such as gazing (staring at children with cold eyes for a long time), distance control (approaching or staying away from children) and minor punishment (taking away children's favorite items), which will make children feel guilty and ashamed of their wrong behaviors, thus reducing and eliminating the number of bad behaviors.
If the baby does something wrong, encourage him to take responsibility bravely. If Yang Yang damaged the light blue toy, the mother should let him know that it was his fault that caused the consequences, and help the baby to take responsibility, accompany him to buy toys to compensate for light blue and apologize to her. Babies who dare to take responsibility are welcome and can win praise, trust and friends for themselves. One advantage of this is that children can get rid of egoism and know that the outside world can't always do whatever they want; The second is to let him suffer the necessary emotional setbacks and experience what is regret, sadness and fear. The third is to let him learn to coordinate the relationship with the environment.
Let the children put forward their own remedies. This will encourage children to think more about their own behavior and enhance their sense of responsibility. If the method proposed by the child is not suitable, you can propose some remedies to guide. The ultimate goal of asking children to remedy their wrong behavior is to teach children to develop their own internal binding force. Generally speaking, children learn things quickly and forget things quickly. In order to effectively use remedial measures to change children's unruly behavior, it must be strengthened more than once. We should patiently and repeatedly strengthen in different situations. Especially for those children who are slow to learn or whose emotions are easily disturbed, they need long-term help.
Regarding the optimization of "Don't lose in family education", I read the article "What are the differences between Chinese mothers and North American mothers" in 20 volumes, and I felt a little bit in my heart. Among them, "North American mothers don't value knowledge and ability", "North American mothers are afraid that their children are not interested in going to interest classes" and "North American mothers don't value getting ahead and pay attention to survival skills" reveal the cultural differences in China, especially in view of the current situation of traditional education and family education in China, which is definitely not worshipping foreign things!
Now, in the large class I teach, many parents are busy enrolling their children in various interest classes in order to adapt their children to primary school life as soon as possible. I don't know that the connection between children is by no means overnight. Too much knowledge is instilled too early, which can easily lead children to learn knowledge and ruin their interest. Regarding the connection between young children, some parents think that children should learn Pinyin in advance, and pay more attention to the addition and subtraction within 65,438+0,500,65,438+0,000, so that they can get good grades when they enter primary school. Some parents think that young convergence means gradually adapting to not taking a nap, learning to tidy up their schoolbags, and being full of expectations for primary schools. As everyone knows, the ideal young connection is far more than that.
Under the current educational situation in China, the ideal connection between children is not only the necessary knowledge accumulation, but also the cultivation of children's comprehensive ability and good life and study habits, which are indispensable. The really good connection between children should be extended to the whole preschool education. According to the characteristics of children's physical and mental development at different ages, step by step and reasonable planning can win. Three months after a large class can be used to cope with urgent needs and sudden literacy and arithmetic, but children's abilities and habits need a long time to cultivate and consolidate.
Pinyin, hard-pen calligraphy, picture-reading and speaking are hard to find. "The advantage of high academic qualifications is only temporary" and will disappear at a certain stage. This situation is like pulling out the seedlings to encourage them. Although advanced education can let children learn more knowledge first, it can cure the symptoms but not the root cause. At the same time, instilling primary school knowledge in advance may affect children's attention and concentration in the classroom in the future. "Many primary school teachers have found that the third grade of primary school is a watershed. Some children who study in advance but don't develop habits and abilities basically eat up their capital in the third grade and lose their advantages, while others come from behind. Make full use of the three-year preschool education stage to cultivate children's abilities and habits, so that children can not only win the first grade of primary school, but also win the long-distance running for life.
Pinyin, arithmetic and other knowledge and skills contribute to children's self-confidence in learning in the early stage, but it is more important to cultivate children's "growth motivation", which is also their soft power, including learning interests and habits, good interpersonal communication, teamwork, leadership and other comprehensive abilities. These abilities help children to quickly integrate into the group after entering primary school and establish friendly relations with teachers and classmates. It takes a year or more to cultivate these abilities.
Therefore, as preschool children, we should not ask them how much knowledge they can learn. The key is to play quality. "Play" is not laissez-faire, nor is it an unconscious and unplanned "free-range". Instead, various teaching methods such as hands-on experiment, role-playing, teamwork, observation and practice, and data collection are used in the game to arouse children's interest, thus resulting in "qualitative change of play". For example, small class is the primary stage of the development of imagination and creativity, and the thinking of 3-year-old children depends on action and vision. If they are asked to tell the number of cars in their hands, they can only count them with their fingers, not with their memories. But this stage is the beginning of children's imagination. In children's eyes, every point and every line has a special expression, because "children have a hundred languages" (the most influential Reggio education system in the world in the 20th century). At the age of 4, children are more energetic, which is the best time to cultivate children's communication skills and teamwork skills. At the age of 5, children's self-control and endurance reached a higher peak, and a sense of time (intentional attention) was gradually formed at this stage.
Our children in China have a strong demand for imagination, creativity and communication skills. For each stage of children's development, parents should provide appropriate educational content according to their physical and mental development characteristics. And the best way is to play games.
After reading the book "Don't lose in family education", I fully understand the importance and particularity of family education and the shortcomings of parents in educating their children.
Parents, as children's first teachers, play an important guiding role in children's healthy growth and good habits.
Although we cultivate children's good study and living habits at home, after reading this book, I still feel that I still have a lot to do.
First of all, I think we should respect our children and let them learn to respect others.
As parents, the general education for children is to obey their parents, so as to be a good child and get rewards and praise. But after reading this book, I have changed my mind now.
I think that although the child is still underage, he is also an independent and thoughtful person who needs to be respected and understood. So now that something has happened to the children at home, we should ask their opinions. Sometimes he can express his views to us, and sometimes we need to give him some guidance. In this way, his decisiveness and self-confidence can gradually grow.
Secondly, treat children calmly. Sometimes we ask him to do something or explain his homework. If he is unwilling or doesn't understand, we will be impatient and make him cry or unwilling to do our request.
In this case, we should calmly explain things to him, make him realize the necessity of doing these things, and talk calmly can make children relax, so that they can communicate with them more.
We didn't let children do things before. Even if the child wants to do it, we don't want him to interfere because we are afraid of making things worse.
However, as children grow up day by day, we think we can exercise our hands-on ability and self-care ability. For example, when eating, we want him to prepare rice bowls and chopsticks. After dinner, we asked him to wash the dishes. On holidays, he also takes the initiative to wash dishes. We agreed and praised him after he finished washing.
From then on, when he offered to help us with the housework, we generally wouldn't refuse him. Through these things, I think it inspires children to practice more and have more good habits, and also cultivates children's sense of responsibility in doing things in an orderly way without losing family education.
Through reading this book, I also realized that family and school are two environments for children to grow up. School education is the same for everyone, so how to make children better than others? It is necessary to strengthen family education, because the family environment affects all aspects of children.