The goal of consultation is to provide psychological help to the clients (usually individuals) by the consultants, so that the latter can overcome the current psychological troubles and improve their ability to cope with setbacks. Judging from the students who come to consult (hereinafter referred to as visiting students), his direct motivation for seeking consultation is psychological troubles that he has been unable to get rid of for some time, such as contradictions with his classmates, criticism for violating discipline in class, test pressure, and troubles of disharmony between parents. He hopes to restore emotional balance through psychological counseling, or get guidance in action, and so on. The direct goal of counseling is to help students get rid of psychological troubles and get through the current crisis smoothly.

At the same time, consultants should also bear in mind that the fundamental goal of consultation is to promote the self-reliance of visiting students. If visiting schools only solves temporary problems and relies too much on consultants, they will always seek the help of consultants in the future, which actually means the failure of consulting. Counselors should not only relieve students' emotional tension, but also let them know how to adjust their emotions. Instead of making decisions for students, we should help them learn how to make their own decisions. Don't tell the student how to do the current thing directly, but help him learn how to plan and control his behavior. In short, students should cultivate their ability and self-confidence to handle their own problems independently through consultation.

(B) the basic principles of consulting activities

The most critical factor for the effectiveness of consulting activities lies in the visiting students' trust in consultants and their active participation in the consulting process. To achieve the purpose of consultation, consultants should mainly grasp the following principles.

1. Pay active attention to and trust visiting students.

Let the visiting students feel the care and trust of the consultant, which is the fundamental premise for him to continue to participate in the consultation and make positive changes. Taking the initiative to pay attention to students is to accept visiting students from the perspective of the whole person and admit that no matter what shortcomings he has, he still deserves respect and care. Every visiting student should receive equal respect and unconditional care. Ordinary teachers may make various comparative evaluations of students in the environment of collective education, such as whether their academic performance is good or not, whether they abide by discipline and so on. Consultants need to pay special attention to avoid being influenced by these evaluations, so as not to prejudice or exclude some visiting students. In the eyes of consultants, every visiting student is also a person who needs care when he encounters difficulties. When students come for advice and help, they often feel more dissatisfied, accused or discriminated by other students, teachers and parents, and feel quite inferior psychologically. Therefore, it is particularly important for the consultant to accept and care for him. Furthermore, only when consultants are optimistic about human nature and human development can they enthusiastically participate in the consulting activities, and pass this trust on to visiting students to stimulate their self-confidence and desire for positive growth. In fact, most of the psychological troubles that appear on students are the products of bad interpersonal environment, and everyone has the desire and potential to overcome obstacles and strive for perfect development. As long as they are actively guided, visiting students can survive the crisis and grow up healthily, and consultants should be full of confidence in this.

2. Fully support and encourage visiting students.

Counselors should carefully and keenly explore positive, positive and valuable places from visiting students, and give timely encouragement to students' progress during the consultation process. Visiting students always feel emotionally confused and depressed at first. Counselors should not blame and teach them, but should give them practical comfort and support to stimulate their positive coping mentality (for example, "I can understand the troubles that things bring you, let's see how to deal with them). Support and encouragement does not mean turning a blind eye to problems, but helping students accept themselves more, and don't treat themselves as useless because of temporary setbacks and troubles. In fact, even in some of the accused behaviors of students, positive elements may be found (for example, "it is not appropriate to talk to dad in a confrontational tone, but this incident also shows that you can boldly express your different ideas"); Encouragement methods also include guiding visiting students to evaluate the progress made since attending the consultation meeting, affirming the leading role of students themselves, strengthening their sense of success and improving their self-confidence.

3. Pay attention to the active participation of visiting students

Students' active participation in the negotiation process is a necessary condition for the negotiation to achieve results. First of all, students should seek counseling and help voluntarily, and it is difficult to force students to receive counseling. Of course, primary school students may often come to receive counseling at the suggestion or request of other teachers and parents. At this time, the counselor needs to pay special attention to protecting the self-esteem of the visiting students, deeply understand what he really feels troubled, and let the students realize that the counselor really wants to help him, thus generating an inherent desire to receive counseling. Secondly, in the whole consultation process, the consultant should put the student in the main position, help him to judge his own problems and decide his own actions, and avoid imposing his subjective judgment on the students and giving them instructions unilaterally, and so on. Thirdly, when students ask to stop consulting, even if the consultant thinks it is necessary to continue, it is not appropriate to force them to ask. Instead, we should calmly analyze the reasons why students want to stop consulting, put forward their reasons for continuing consulting activities in an equal way, or recommend other consultants, and finally let students make their own decisions.

4. Keep the visiting students strictly confidential.

Confidentiality is the basis for visiting students to have trust in consultants and consultants. Personal problems and opinions discussed by visiting students in consultation shall not be disclosed and disseminated to anyone else without their consent. Consultants can also record the personal data and consultation details of visiting students and establish files, which are not allowed to be consulted by anyone except the relevant consultants. Visiting students often worry about whether the consultant will tell others about his situation and ideas, especially to the class teacher, department teacher or parents. Consultants should explain to students in an appropriate way and ensure the confidentiality of the consultation. Of course, when the consultant is convinced that the students are in a dangerous and urgent situation and need the intervention of parents or other teachers (such as wounding or suicide attempts, behavioral thoughts that endanger society), it is an exception, but even so, we should try our best to explain and explain to the visiting students first.