I. Childhood experience
Dad is the second child, but I have never met my uncle, which has always been a question when I was a child. Finally, one day I couldn't help asking my grandmother, and she said, "Your uncle went to the West to learn from the scriptures!" " "In fact, at that time, I didn't understand the meaning of this sentence at all. Grandma ignored me when she finished, and I dared not ask again.
I first faced death when I was seven years old, and my great-grandfather passed away. Grandpa is 88 years old. Maybe a funeral. I can't feel the sadness of adults, and I don't feel sad and afraid myself. I only remember that after the funeral, I went to my neighbor's house to play as before, but those people saw me from a distance and quickly closed the door, which made me very sad and impressed.
It was not until I was ten years old that something happened that I was afraid of death. When I was in the third grade, there was a murder case in the neighboring village. Both the deceased and the murderer were under 18 years old. The boy killed the girl in cold blood in the bamboo forest by the river. Boys and girls are neighbors. As for the cause of the crime, there are many versions circulating.
The most direct impact of this incident on me is the fear of death. Every time I hear someone's funeral, I'm scared to death. I'm afraid to hear or see anything related to death. Even looking at the direction of the village from a distance at night, I feel scared.
This feeling of fear has been with me since I finished primary school. In those years, I never dared to go out at night or even cross the village in broad daylight, let alone go to the river. After graduating from primary school, I left home to go to school in the town, but this river became the only way to go home on weekends. At first, I was afraid to go home until I had a company. After a long time, that fear gradually faded.
This matter seems to have a great influence on me. I think there may be two reasons. First, the murderer is someone I know. He is the youngest son of one of my teachers. Second, the murder scene is where I pass from time to time. This makes me feel that death is close to me, and even my life is threatened.
It's time for junior year to face the problem of death again. When I went home that summer vacation, my grandfather fell ill and his health became worse and worse. Father said, I often see grandpa cry. At that time, I thought to myself, "Why is Grandpa so unhappy when he is seventy years old and facing death?" When I returned to school after the holiday, I went to the library to find the answer and found a book called Western Philosophy of Death, which opened the way for me to think about death rationally.
Second, the western philosophy of death
Western Philosophy of Death is the work of Duan Dezhi, a professor at Wuhan University. The first edition was published in the early 1990s, which caused a sensation at home and abroad, and became a pioneering work in the study of death philosophy. Many universities at home and abroad have set up courses such as philosophy of death, life and death science, life education, etc., and will use this book as a teaching material or a necessary reference book.
At my level, I can't understand this book at all. I remember that only one philosopher left an impression on my mind at that time, that is Epicurus, just because I like his famous saying: "Death is the head of all evil, which is insignificant to us, because when we exist, death has not come to us, and when we die, we no longer exist. So death has nothing to do with the living and the dead. Because for the living, death does not exist, and the deceased itself does not exist at all. " I understood this passage, which made me rationally transcend my fear of death for the first time.
Teacher Duan said in the book: "Live well before you die, and die well when you die. This is the most important education we can get from Epicurus' philosophy, which is Epicurus' whole philosophy of death. I am convinced of this. In dealing with the issue of life and death, we should "live when we are born, die when we die, and come and go freely".
Third, Zhuangzi's view of life and death.
Perhaps for me at that time, after reading the western philosophy of death, Sophie's world, philosophical stories, Zhouyi and Zhuangzi, I liked Zhuangzi best. Therefore, when choosing the topic of my graduation thesis, I chose Zhuangzi without hesitation, and I also chose China philosophy as my postgraduate major.
In the process of preparing my thesis, I paid attention to Zhuangzi's view of life and death. Among China philosophers, Zhuangzi's exposition of death is the most thorough, and his view of life and death has a far-reaching influence in the history of China.
In Zhuangzi's view, ordinary people are afraid of death, but it is totally unnecessary, because people are likely to regret their greedy behavior when they die, just as Li Ji regrets crying. What's more, life may not be happy, death may not be bitter, and even happiness after death may not be comparable to being an emperor.
People are afraid of death because they don't know what will happen after death. This is the fear of the unknown. Understand the essence of life and death, you will not be afraid of death, and you will not be too sad in the face of death.
The story of Zhuangzi's wife's death is recorded in Zhuangzi Zhile. Facing Keiko's accusation, Zhuangzi explained: "She just died, how can I not be sad? However, it was observed that she was originally lifeless, not only lifeless but also shapeless, shapeless and lifeless. If there is nothing, it turns into gas, gasification into shape, life into life, and now it turns into death. This change from birth to death is just like the operation of the four seasons. People are resting quietly between heaven and earth, and I am still crying. I think this is the truth of life, so I don't cry. "
So people's life and death are like the gathering and dispersion of qi. The change of life and death, like the alternation of day and night, is a natural thing. In Feng Youlan's words, Zhuangzi is "controlling emotions with reason" and controlling and transcending emotions with rational thinking.
Although we, as ordinary people, can't really be detached like Zhuangzi, this rational thinking does help to transcend the fear of death. At least for me, after this period of thinking, every time I face the problem of death, there will be no more fear.
Attachment: Zhuangzi related original:
1, "On Homogeneous Things": "If you do evil, know life will not be confused! Do evil, know evil to death, don't be weak and mourn, don't know evil to return! The son of Ai, who got it at the beginning of Jin State, sobbed; As for the position of the king, he basked in the sun in bed with the king, ate straw and regretted crying. If you are evil, you will know that the deceased will not regret it! "
2. In the article "Happiness", Zhuangzi said through the mouth of a skull: "When you die, there is no gentleman, and there is no minister, and there is nothing at all times. From the (vertical) point of view, heaven and earth are spring and autumn, although South Wang Le cannot pass. "
3. When Zhuangzi's wife died, Keiko hung and Zhuangzi sang in the drum basin.
Keiko said, "Living with others, the eldest son is old and dead. It's enough not to cry. It's not bad to drum up and sing!"
Zhuangzi said, "Otherwise. Finish what you started, I can't be alone! There is no life in the beginning, no life in the disciples, no life in the disciples and no life in the disciples. Miscellaneous between awn and fluorene, it turns into gas, gasifies into shape, it turns into life, and now it turns into death, just like spring, summer, autumn and winter. People were lying in a huge room, and I cried with it, thinking that I couldn't live any longer, so I stopped. "
4, "Know the North Tour": "The life of people, the gathering of gas; If you gather, you will live, and if you disperse, you will die. "
5, "Tai Shang Lao Jun": "Death is born, life is also, it has a constant night, and the sky is also."
Yu Zijun residence