Xiaobei has always felt that some parents may have the idea of "preferring sons over daughters", and between sons and daughters, they will prefer sons.

Because the concept of "son preference" has continued since ancient times, the older generation thinks that sons can carry on the family line, the children born can take their surnames, and parents still have to rely on their sons to provide for the elderly when they are old, so they will love their sons more among their children.

Of course, with the reform and opening up, many people's horizons have gradually broadened, and most people have abandoned the pedantic and harmful thought of "favoring boys over girls".

However, some parents still stubbornly believe that their daughters are not as important as their sons, which leads to "helping their younger brothers" or "being helped by their younger brothers" in their lives.

In fact, many people have been writing about this topic, and most men also think that "helping the younger brother" can't get married.

However, the story Xiaobei wants to tell you today makes Xiaobei feel a little incredible. Although not a "helper", he is also an eccentric parent.

As we all know, as a man, there is some "male chauvinism" in his heart, so many men are also excluded from the son-in-law.

Because, in our country, there has always been a tradition of "men marry women as wives". For the man to adopt to the woman's house, it will hurt the "self-esteem" in the man's heart.

Of course, some people are willing to take the initiative to adopt a son-in-law for love, but even for love, he is still a little uncomfortable, especially when listening to people's comments.

For those who choose a son-in-law, there are some "feelings have to be". Some people can't afford the high bride price, while others are because there are many men at home.

The story told by Xiaobei today is actually a message from a reader a few days ago. He is the door-to-door son-in-law of the adopted son-in-law, and he chose the adopted son-in-law because there are many men in the family and his parents forced him to be the door-to-door son-in-law.

Although such people make us feel incomprehensible. But I have to say that such people do exist.

02

Recently, Yan Li (pseudonym) has just been diagnosed with gastric cancer. Hearing the news, he and his wife felt very sad. After all, he is young, just over thirty.

But fortunately, his stomach cancer is not advanced, it belongs to the kind that was discovered earlier, and there is hope for treatment. But at the same time, through this incident, Yan Li can clearly see his parents.

Li Yan's family has two brothers. Li Yan has a younger brother who is five years younger than Yan Li.

Relatively speaking, of the two brothers, Yan Li is always more sensible than his younger brother, and Yan Li is also more filial than his younger brother.

As the saying goes, "only crying children have milk to eat." Li Yan's family is like this. Although Yan Li is more sensible and filial, it happened that his parents prefer his younger brother.

Yan Li's family is not very good, especially in the countryside 30 years ago. Parents with many children must pay more attention.

In fact, before his brother was born, Yan Li was loved by his family, and his grandparents, father and mother all loved him very much. However, after the younger brother was born, because his younger brother looked cuter than Yan Li, the attention of grandparents and parents was attracted by his younger brother.

At first, some families may pay more attention to their newborn children because they need more attention. However, Li Yan's family was poor, and his parents preferred his younger brother, so he ignored Yan Li, which will last for decades.

Yan Li said in his message: "Since I was six years old, my parents almost regarded me as air. Sometimes when cooking, they just ignore me. To tell the truth, the most I can hear from growing up is that some parents prefer boys to girls.

Although this is a little paranoid, what I want to say is that I didn't expect my parents to treat me like air. Is there anything good at home? I didn't even have the right to choose after my brother chose them.

I really don't know where I offended my parents. I also asked them doubtfully if I was adopted by them. But they always say I'm one of us.

Biological. I am their biological parents. However, I haven't even felt the slightest love. I think I can live to this day because of my own efforts. "

03

In fact, Yan Li didn't boast. In the message he gave me, there was a photo that he took at someone else's house when he was a child.

Yan Li said, "Although our family is poor, several families in the village are doing well. At that time, my parents didn't have my share of cooking, so I went to someone else's house to eat. Although it is thankless, the meal of people who live well is not bad.

This photo, in fact, I just took advantage of their family's invitation to take pictures and ran in to rub a bowl of rice. In front of outsiders, they were embarrassed to kick me out. "

To tell the truth, at first, I still didn't believe Yan Li's story, mainly because Xiaobei always thought that there could be no cruel parents in the world.

However, in that photo, Yan Li looked really funny when he was a child. The photographer left a noodle on his lips (upon request, he didn't want me to publish the photo, I hope readers can understand), and I was really worried about the way he looked in his eyes.

/kloc-at the age of 0/9, Yan Li was forced to be a son-in-law by her parents because rural children got married early. His parents did this in order to save 1000 yuan as a bride price.

Maybe everyone can't believe that the bride price ten years ago was really not as outrageous as it is now. It was only 1000 yuan at that time. But the man's family needs to beat some wardrobes and cupboards with their hands.

Yan Li said that at that time, their family still owed a lot of foreign debts and had no money to marry him. In addition, the girl introduced by the matchmaker was an only child, so Yan Li's parents asked Yan Li to be their son-in-law to save money.

Yan Li didn't want to be a son-in-law, but as a filial child, he finally decided to listen to his parents' arrangement and was adopted to his in-laws now.

Although his wife's family conditions are not particularly good, she is an only child after all, and she also said that two people get married and the daughter doesn't want a bride price, which just meets the requirements of Yan Li's parents. In this way, Yan Li became a son-in-law.

Although Yan Li is a door-to-door son-in-law, she has not been turned away from her in-laws because her in-laws have never had a son, so she always treats Li Yan as her own son.

Although Yan Li went to her father-in-law's house to be a door-to-door son-in-law, she still thought about her parents.

04

After Yan Li gets married, he should live well with his wife, and his parents-in-law are also very kind to him. But Yan Li earns money every month and still gives most of it to his parents.

Because the family situation was really bad at that time, my brother went to middle school, my father was a person who didn't like to work hard, and my mother wanted to get it from Yan Li.

Yan Li's wife was so sympathetic to Li Yan's family that she turned a blind eye to Yan Li's behavior. Therefore, Yan Li's married life is quite happy.

Moreover, I have been married for more than ten years and have two daughters. Because I live with my parents-in-law, my two daughters grew up with the help of their parents-in-law.

For more than ten years, Yan Li has been "the last straw" for his parents. He still insists on giving his parents some money every month. Although not as much as before, it is almost half of his salary.

Moreover, my parents' life has been greatly improved, my brother has got married and my family has settled down. However, his parents always look for various reasons to ask Yan Li for money and want Yan Li to help them as before.

For this son, Yan Li's parents didn't show anything before, and Yan Li often went back to see them with his wife and children. There was no difference, but in terms of money, Yan Li's parents were more calculating.

However, because things have always been like this, Yan Li and his wife never cared about it.

Originally, life has always been quiet, but just a month ago, Li Yan always felt a stomachache. Because Yan Li didn't eat regularly before, she thought it might be a common stomach trouble at first, so she bought some medicine at the drugstore and thought it would be fine.

But after a while, it didn't work at all. At the urging of his wife, Yan Li went to the hospital for an examination.

I didn't pay much attention to it at first, but after the test results came out, the whole family fell into grief. Yan Li has detected gastric cancer. If there is any luck, it is that the doctor said that it was found in time, so there is still time for the operation.

But money is a big problem. After hearing the news, relatives and friends also borrowed some money, but it was still not enough.

05

Looking at his wife and her parents-in-law lending money for their own treatment, Yan Li felt guilty, thinking that at this critical moment, his parents would definitely not stand by and at least he had helped his parents and younger brother for many years.

But what Yan Li never expected was that he returned to his parents' home. He told his mother, "Mom, I have stomach cancer and need money for surgery. I have given most of my money to you and my brother over the years. Now I need money. Can you help me? "

At first, Yan Li's parents' initial performance was also very painful. At that time, Yan Li thought that his parents' grief made him regret telling them this cruel fact.

But when it comes to borrowing money, Yan Li's sister-in-law jumped out and cut in. She sarcastically said, "You have been unfilial to your parents at home all these years. How dare you ask them for money? Besides, you are a door-to-door son-in-law, no different from a married daughter. It's all spilled water. "

After seeing their daughter-in-law, Yan Li's parents suddenly changed their attitude, as if they were afraid of Yan Li's brother-in-law.

When Yan Li mentioned borrowing money again, his parents began to cry. Especially Yan Li's mother, she said, "The daughter-in-law is right. You are not from our family. You spilled the water. "

Yan Li at this time, finally see the reality. No matter how hard you try to please your parents, you are still the unlovable "eldest son" or even an "outsider" in their eyes.

Indeed, Yan Li's brother-in-law is a very overbearing daughter-in-law. Since entering her husband's family, she has asked for exclusive power. She decides all the big and small things in the family.

In fact, Yan Li's parents didn't ask Yan Li for money in the early years, but this kannika nimtragol felt that since someone gave money for nothing, why not ask for it for a long time? Then, in order to encourage Yan Li's parents, he continued to ask Yan Li for money.

Now that he is ill, he goes back to his parents' house for help. Originally, his parents were going to give some help for the sake of years of affection. It's a pity that kannika nimtragol is in charge at home.

Although I am worried that I have no money to treat the disease, I am more worried about my parents' practices. My parents-in-law and wife were very angry when they learned that, but they held back their anger and persuaded Yan Li to relax.

Also said that the problem of money, everyone to find a way to, finally Yan Li's surgery was done, but the operation was quite successful.

06

Xiaobei is very sympathetic and sad about what happened to Yan Li.

In the past, Xiaobei always felt that there were only cruel children in the world and there could be no cruel parents. Of course, Yan Li's parents may be moved by Yan Li's filial piety for many years, but they still listened to Kannika nimtragol and refused Yan Li's help.

We often say that it is the duty of children to honor their parents. However, for those parents who were born without support, do children really have the obligation to support and raise?

As the saying goes: born without raising, broken fingers can be returned.

For Yan Li's parents, they neglected Yan Li since childhood, and even later called him "coming out of the ruins", which was really chilling.

Of course, this kind of thing should rarely exist, but there are exceptions. We are all different individuals, and we have different experiences every day, so it is difficult to empathize with other people's lives.

Whether Yan Li's words are exaggerated or not, I still hope that more parents will not be partial to their children, because this will only chill their hearts and make their old age more insecure.