First of all, stay away from garbage people

Since ancient times, there has been a rhetoric that "why don't men take Wu Gou and accept fifty states in Guanshan". Although times are different now and men and women are equal, many things have entered the collective subconscious of human beings, influencing our lives imperceptibly. For example, men should be able to improve themselves. Get rid of its dross and keep its essence to encourage yourself. People who have no ability will have four habits.

1. I don't act, I just want to rely on others.

If a person eats, drinks and plays by his own efforts, it is understandable that such a person enjoys life. By the same token, as long as a person does not interfere with others, it has nothing to do with others, because it is the result of his own life and his own choice.

However, if a person is lazy, he is often eating the fruits of other people's labor, because he has not created the same labor value as enjoying it. There is no doubt that someone must pay for his failure to pay, and usually this person is his closest person, so the person he hurts the most is his closest person.

2. Big temper, small skill

This kind of person is always influenced by emotions and his "bad temper". From a psychological point of view, emotions are not facts, and the facts affected by emotions will always change. A person is always obsessed with emotions without paying attention to the facts themselves, so such a person and such a man will have a small "heart".

Always trying to vent their emotions, hoping to change the status quo, people around them are hard to be happy, and they will not be happy. The so-called big temper and small skill are reasonable, because people who know how to control and reasonably vent their emotions will have a more reasonable understanding and understanding of people and things.

3. Irresponsible, always making excuses.

An irresponsible person is always full of excuses. After the problem appears, he will tell all kinds of objective reasons in a conditioned way. Although these reasons can be justified and give a basic explanation to the problem, which can be clearly heard by onlookers, they are actually just an excuse.

4. refuse to tolerate others and always dislike others.

I feel more and more that tolerance and understanding are not just a one-way effort to others, but an act of self-interest, because in this society and this world, only you know your feelings, and you must find your own way out to make yourself better and happier.

Find a way to live a better life. Here, Buddhism's "letting go" has a universal role. Tolerance and understanding of others is the greatest forgiveness for yourself and the best mood for yourself. On the contrary, if you always don't like others, you need to find your own problems.

Psychology tells us that people are the expression of "heart", and everyone needs to become better and change themselves from the inside out. When the "heart" begins to realize, actions will keep up, constantly strengthen behaviors and solidify actions. This is how a good man is tempered. Don't deny that we need to do it first

Second, identify garbage girls.

It is said that men are dishonest, and more than half of men in the world have dishonest hearts. When looking for the other half, women will look at whether the other person is an honest man or not, and will value whether the other person is loyal enough to the marriage.

In fact, dishonesty is not only for men, but also for many women. Happiness is a lifetime thing, and marriage is a long-term cooperative project in which a man and a woman grow together and operate hand in hand. Only when two people trust each other enough and are loyal to each other can this marriage come to an end and get a satisfactory result.

Therefore, in marriage, not only women but also men should keep their eyes open to see if you are a loyal woman in the future. Dishonest women generally have these characteristics.

1. Cheating

Men should know that if a woman is not what she looks like, she is likely to disgust men. This intuitive response is correct, because such women are often very playboy. They don't know what loyalty is. They may be pure and single-minded, but they are dirty and playboy at heart. Such women, men still leave them early, don't be cheated by them.

2. Most of the address books are men.

It's not a mobile phone address book, or some social software, where the opposite sex greatly exceeds the same sex. This is just a means of screening. Through some exchanges and communication, we must know something about each other before we can be together. Normal men and women, the address book is at most half to half. Except for special jobs, those who exceed this ratio are basically playboys and dishonest women. Be careful when you meet such a woman.

Know a person's heart very well

In other words, such a woman knows the way men think and think very well. When she is with men, she can always fool the men around her. When she is with a man, she can grasp the discretion and let him pay for himself willingly. When a man wants to give up, she will give him a little sweetness. When men are striving for it, they will start to stay away, ignore and neglect it. This kind of woman can catch a man's heart, but she is also a woman.

Don't introduce you to her friends.

When you were in love together, the ocean was deep, but when you introduced her to your relatives and friends, the other friends didn't know you existed. At this time you need to think about your relationship. Is it really as beautiful as you think? They are not interested in you at all, and there may be less perfunctory ingredients. Such a woman may be dishonest. She regards you as a spare tire, and once she meets a better man, she will dump you immediately!

5. It's always touching.

Some women always like to touch men, even strangers will not reject touching people. I like to smile at others and laugh with others. Such a woman is not worthy of men's love, always coquetry to men and likes to get something for nothing. Love rat is unforgivable, and so is love rat. So don't fall in love with such a woman foolishly.

If a woman wants to look like a woman, she should be reserved. An acquaintance can be said to be very close to you, but no matter how close, as long as she is not a boyfriend or girlfriend, a woman will be labeled as a playboy if she does not keep a proper distance from the opposite sex. Such a woman can't be beautiful, be careful that the top of her head is green!

6. Have an affair with many people

Some women like to hang out with colleagues, ex-boyfriends and bosses. These women are particularly hateful and have very ambiguous relationships with many men. She also likes to send all kinds of ambiguous messages to many men on her mobile phone, such as she misses you and what she said, dear. These women and men need to see clearly. Such a woman, even if you love again, can't have it. Feelings are most afraid of being unfaithful. A woman who likes to play with others is paving the way for an extramarital affair, which is simply a scourge!

7. The touch of others is not exclusive.

A woman's body is her own, so she should love herself, but some women do not exclude physical contact with strange men. A man's kiss and a stranger's hug are never exclusive.

A woman who really deserves to be loved is not like this. A woman who loves herself will push him away at this time and won't like any touch from a man.

8. Always show off your suitors.

The comparison of women is terrible. They like all suitors and keep a developing relationship with them. These women like to find multiple spare tires. A woman who can show off her love history, there is nothing she can't do. A clever woman would never make such a mistake! The past is the past, and the past is no longer mentioned. This is the best respect for the predecessor and the present!

For women who show off their suitors, men can't chase them even if they love them again, otherwise you will be the next one to show off.

Third, the ideal spouse.

Everyone is eager for success, hoping that they can have a smooth career and achieve extraordinary results. After investigation, Martin, a psychology professor at Stanford University, found that people who can achieve great things actually have some common characteristics.

1. Broad-minded

I often hear a quote from Laozi's Tao Te Ching: Good is like water. Why is the supreme good like water? Because the nature of water is "to benefit all things without arguing".

People who can "benefit everything without fighting" are voluntarily used by talents in the world, and Liu Bei in the Three Kingdoms is the best example. "The husband does not dispute, and the world cannot compete with it." This is the highest level achieved by leaders in strategic positions.

Water is a symbol of wealth, which is a traditional gene rooted in the bones of China people. Therefore, businessmen always like to put some running water devices in companies and shops. Water is flowing, just like money is circulating. Water will accumulate where the water level is low. If you can be "open-minded", the whole valley will have huge waters (wealth). People who do well in business often say that money is not earned by one person. Running water does not rot, sharing with others and not monopolizing can lead to healthy competition, big cakes and sustainable development.

To do this, you need to be broad-minded enough, regardless of petty profits, and have a grand layout. This is the only way to success.

However, narrow-minded people can't hide that others are better than themselves and can't tolerate others. Therefore, every place is fortified, even crowded out and framed, not to mention mobilizing everyone's enthusiasm, so as to give full play to their respective strengths and jointly make great achievements.

Shangshu Qin Shi explains the difference between broad-minded and narrow-minded. I suggest you have a look at it sometime. A sigh spanning more than two thousand years is enough to sound an alarm for future generations!

2. Full of toughness

On the road to success, it is doomed that it will not be smooth sailing, and there will always be difficulties and obstacles ahead.

The greatness of those who can achieve great things lies in their persistence in green hills, which is different from the persistence of ordinary people. Success is often when you feel you can't hold on, and then bite the bullet and hold on.

This requires a strong desire for success, excellent psychological quality, a self-confident attitude of pushing yourself and others, and a tenacious spirit of not giving up until you reach your goal.

Those who give up easily when encountering setbacks will never succeed.

3. Self-motivation

Everyone has a lazy side, which is no big deal. Relax occasionally, call a friend, have a few drinks, make friends, travel together, or stay indoors for a day, collapse on the sofa and enjoy the rare lazy time, all of which are beneficial to body and mind.

However, the difference between those who achieve great things and the general public is that the former is more self-motivated and self-disciplined, and there is no need to whip themselves. Once in a while, they are covered in blood and rush to the battlefield; Those who have not achieved much often need the supervision of others; People who have accomplished nothing turn a deaf ear to advice.

An enterprising person will learn new knowledge or skills every day and maintain a strong thirst for knowledge. As time goes on, water drops and stones will wear away.

On the other hand, others have been unconsciously overtaken by their peers and even rising stars.

4. Be brave in pioneering and innovating

The road ahead is not afraid of thousands of obstacles, but of surrender; The sails of life are not afraid of storms, but they are afraid that they have no courage! If there is a way, go boldly; If you have a dream, fly boldly. Boldness should be our belief; You know, the direction against the wind is more suitable for flying; Is the direction of life struggle!

5. Persistent pursuit

When you make up your mind to take a road, don't look around, and don't linger over the beautiful scenery. You should be clear about your purpose, know what you are pursuing and where you are pursuing, and remind yourself from time to time.

Step 6 constantly enrich yourself

No one sent breakfast, so I cooked it myself. No one said good night, just told himself; No one cares about sunny and rainy temperatures; No one made an appointment, so I arranged it all day by myself. Always staring at the water in your hand, always thinking that getting rid of being single will make haste, waste time. Nothing is wrong except making yourself more wonderful. If you are in full bloom, butterflies will come.

7. Have a principled bottom line

Women can be single-minded, affectionate and persistent, but they should cherish your contribution, not the more the better, and have their own principle bottom line. You have to live a wonderful life. Don't treat men as your days. Paying too much and losing yourself will make men look down on you. Self-respect and self-love, self-reliance, and relaxation can keep your sky from raining. Even if it rains, you have a small umbrella in your hand.

8. Everything is prepared in advance.

What determines today is not today, but yesterday's attitude towards life; It's not tomorrow that will determine tomorrow, but what you did today. Our today is determined by the past and our tomorrow is determined by today.

9. Don't forget your innovative spirit

Maybe you are tired now, but there is still a long way to go. Don't forget why you started, what keeps you going, and don't forget your innovative spirit. Lost oneself can only be picked up bit by bit. Now I don't deserve to shout tired, because I have nothing. Swallow your grievances and tears. Don't lose if you can't afford to lose. If you can't die, stand up and tell everyone who looks down on you: I'm fine.

10. Confidence is not conceit.

When looking up at the sky, everything is higher than you, and you will feel inferior; When looking down at the earth, everything is lower than you, and you will be conceited; Only by broadening our horizons and taking a panoramic view of heaven and earth can we find our true position between heaven and earth. Don't feel inferior, don't be conceited, and insist on self-confidence.

1 1.

When you are young, you can earn if you have insufficient balance, and you can charge if you have insufficient electricity. Time is gone forever. You should fight for it when you are young. How much you pay, how much you will get. Don't compare, don't complain, don't care, pay more, because there is an effort called relying on yourself.

12. indomitable

The world is not in the hands of those mockers, but in the hands of those who can stand ridicule and criticism and keep moving forward.

13. Will enjoy life.

Every experience in life is writing your resume. What you think is trivial, when you look back, there are countless scales. What you spell is very different in meaning and value from what others send to your mouth.

14. Work hard

People who walk with their heads down only see the thickness of the earth but ignore the height of the sky; People who walk with their heads up only see the vastness of the sky, but ignore the hardships and precipitousness under their feet. We need to look forward to the year one day, and we need to start a year full of hope one day.

15. Seriously adhere to it

The two most precious words in the world: one is earnest and the other is persistence. Serious people change themselves, persistent people change their destiny.

16. Dare to take responsibility

Life is like a deck of cards. No matter whether the cards in our hands are good or bad, we should try our best to play to the extreme, just as no matter what happens in our life, what matters is our method and attitude.

17. Self-reliance

You can't rely on anyone but yourself. No one in this world will want to be relied on by you all the time. Only by relying on yourself can we do things best; Only by relying on ourselves can we learn the real skills and really solve problems; You can't lose in life by yourself.

18. Work hard

Think of hard work as a habit, not a three-minute fever. Persistence is king. Every harvest you admire is earned by the hard work of others ... You can complain or ignore it, but remember that you are not qualified to give up without hard work.

19. Perseverance

However, successful people often go through a dark period without support and help, and this period is precisely the key stage of self-precipitation. Just like the darkness before dawn, it will be bright after getting through it. The so-called maxima is not necessarily the fastest, but it must be the best endurance. You can complain, but you must be patient, accumulate strength and wait for opportunities-only in this way can there be hope in life.

20. Self-improvement

Self-improvement is the mother of luck, and a real life can only be achieved through hard work. If you are strong enough, you are unprecedented; If you can continue to improve yourself under difficult circumstances, then you are admirable.

2 1. Solidarity and mutual assistance

Sail, not hanging on the mast, is a useless piece of cloth; A mast, without sails, is an ordinary pillar; Ideal, without action, is an illusory fog; No ideal action is an endless road.

2 1. Based on now

Today is short, but today is very important. A beautiful today can not only turn yesterday's glory into tomorrow's glory, but also turn yesterday's failure into tomorrow's success. So, today, don't always miss, always sigh, always complain, and take every day as the beginning of life! Only from scratch, down-to-earth, wholeheartedly manage today, will usher in a brilliant tomorrow.

22. Tough and strong

Life has given us too much load, and we move forward in a staggered manner. But every step you take is a new starting point. You are not afraid of the present, and every step you take is a footprint of success. Only after the hardships of trekking and the baptism of setbacks will it gradually become thick and full. Don't cry when you fall, this is tenacity; It is strong to stand up after falling. Fate has cast too many shadows on our road. With your tenacity and strength, I believe I will finally succeed and shine!

Fourth, the best among those who need to be vigilant.

In life, those who are very shrewd often give others a mysterious feeling. When their friendship is shallow, they never express their true thoughts to others, let alone reveal their living conditions too much. Although a person is shrewd, it doesn't mean that a person is not good, but I always feel insecure when I associate with people who are shrewd.

1. Emotion is intangible.

Generally speaking, people with deep talent have very strong emotional control ability. No matter at work or in life, they can show their emotions in the face of unexpected situations.

Liu Bei is described in the annals of the Three Kingdoms and Shu Zhi, "Emotionally invisible, good at making friends with heroes, and eager to become attached to them when he was young." As we all know, Liu Bei is a shrewd man. When he was young, he tasted the sufferings of the world, but he worked hard step by step and eventually became the first emperor of Shu Han.

In fact, the success of many celebrities is inseparable from their excellent emotional control ability, and it is this trait that helps them go further on the road to success.

2. Have different opinions

You'll never guess what a smart person really thinks. They won't reveal everything about themselves to others until they finally achieve their goal. Even if you ask them again and again, they will say something else.

If we want to judge whether a person is smart in life, we should first look at whether he often expresses different opinions. If he always tells you something against his will, or even does something completely inconsistent with his usual performance, then you should be careful. This kind of person is often very shrewd and doesn't regard you as a bosom friend in his heart.

be discreet

In life, there are such people who are always very cautious in doing things. At first glance, they may be inconspicuous in the crowd, but after in-depth contact, you will find that they are watertight and will not leave any excuses for others.

When getting along, their caution can even reach the point where you doubt life. They consider everything that most people never thought of.

This extremely cautious psychology also makes them feel extremely complicated in the process of getting along with others, as if your friendship is not so pure!

4. Balance of payments

The greatest feature of a shrewd man is his wit. No matter what the environment, they can get both ends meet, do not offend anyone, and at the same time take care of everyone's emotions and ideas.

Unlike those with simple minds and no scheming, smart people can't see any sharpness and sharpness. When they consider problems, they are often complicated and always weigh and guess, so more often, they always look like nice people. Although it will be comfortable to get along with them in daily communication, you will always lose some true feelings.

5. Keep it up.

No one can be smooth sailing in life, tolerance is a compulsory course for growth, but if a person is too forbearing, then this person is likely to be very smart.

It is often said that only by enduring what ordinary people can't stand can they achieve what ordinary people can't. If a person is too forbearing, it means that he must be planning something.

Nowadays, the social competition is becoming more and more fierce, and everyone is under great pressure. The deeper you bury your grievances and unwillingness, the more likely you are to have various psychological problems. Appropriate tolerance is conducive to personal growth, but excessive tolerance shows that this person is very shrewd and must be trying to pursue something!

Ding guijun

2065438+July 6, 2008