A mother took her 5-year-old son to the street, and the lively child ran ahead and ran a red light to cross the road. At this moment, a car came. Although the driver braked in time and didn't hit the child, he still scared the child to panic and fell to the ground.
The child's mother hurried forward to help the child, and the driver immediately got off the bus. The driver feels that he drove too fast and frightened the child. He should apologize to the child and his mother.
However, the child's mother did not blame the driver, but criticized the child: "It's your own fault to cross the road without looking around, especially if you ran a red light." And ask the child to apologize to the driver.
Finally, the child really persuaded the driver to admit his mistake.
Teach children to admit their mistakes.
Although everyone makes mistakes, few people dare to admit their mistakes and take responsibility for them. Adults are still like this, let alone children. Influenced by traditional ideas, some parents think that children's mistakes don't need to be corrected, and children will naturally grow up. As everyone knows, this attitude of parents will lead children to be self-righteous and correct their mistakes.
Other parents think that children are too young to take responsibility. The child made a mistake. As parents, it is natural to apologize for their children. It is true that parents love their children, but this educational way of apologizing for their children is not helpful to their growth.
There is an old saying in our country: a hero should be a hero. Since the child has done something wrong, he should be allowed to apologize to others and compensate for the losses. This is not only to get forgiveness from others, but more importantly, to let children know how to be responsible for their words and deeds from an early age, which is very beneficial to enhance their self-discipline and cautious words and deeds, as well as to independently and comprehensively assume their responsibilities and obligations in life in the future and smoothly integrate into social life.
Children should learn to be responsible for the consequences of their actions. If a child breaks a neighbor's window, he should pay for it himself, even if he spends all his pocket money. However, he will never get a penny from his parents for this. If the money is not enough, parents can consider lending him money, but he must have his own repayment plan. For example, mom and dad send hot milk and bread in the morning, clean the room on weekends and save their weekly pocket money. The reason why parents do this is to make their children pay for their mistakes. Only by paying this price can children accept this precious life lesson.
When a child does something wrong, parents apologize for the child and apologize to others. Although their original intention is to love children, this love is reasonable, but it is unreasonable. Children are still young, and their ability to distinguish right from wrong is not strong. If parents blindly apologize to others on behalf of their children, instead of letting them know what they have done wrong and not letting them take responsibility for what they have done, it is easy for them to develop a dependent mentality and rely on their parents for everything. In addition, parents' behavior is to protect their children's fault, and children can neither learn from it nor establish a sense of responsibility for their words and deeds. This may be the root cause of children's repeated education.
Under normal circumstances, children can't do anything out of line, but because parents always come forward to take the fall for their children, over time, it is easy for children to feel that everything is supported by their parents and everything can be solved, thus gradually becoming unscrupulous and doing whatever they want.
Parents should let their children say "I'm sorry", let them know that they are responsible for their mistakes and cultivate their sense of responsibility. In this way, when children grow up, they will be brave enough to take on family and social responsibilities and become an independent, strong and responsible person.
It is of course important to admit your mistake bravely and apologize honestly, but before apologizing, let the child think about why he apologized and what he did wrong, so that he won't make the same mistake again. It can be said that this is more important than just saying "I'm sorry"
In real life, many parents force their children to say "I'm sorry", which can only make children mistakenly think that saying "I'm sorry" can solve the problem. In fact, for them, it is the most important thing to know where they are wrong, to know their mistakes, to admit their mistakes and to know how to reflect.
When a child does something wrong, parents should not blindly cover it up, but help the child analyze the cause and effect of the matter and let him know that he has done something wrong and he should take responsibility for it. He should apologize to each other and seek their understanding, which is necessary to cultivate children's sense of responsibility.
Parents must encourage their children to admit their mistakes and give them rewards and praise. Many parents only reward their children when they are "wonderful", and it is even harder to admit mistakes. At the same time, parents should help their children find the reasons for their mistakes and then seek solutions with their children. Many times, the experience and lessons of failure can promote a person's growth. Smart parents can let their children see their growth in the process of denying themselves and experience a deeper sense of accomplishment.
One day, a mother took her daughter to the square to play ball. After a while, some children came, so everyone played together.
Suddenly, the mother heard the child crying, but she didn't go there, just watched from a distance. After a while, my daughter came over in dismay.
Mother asked her why she stopped playing. She said that she was fighting for the ball with a child and accidentally pushed the child down, and the child began to cry. Other children asked her to apologize to the child, but she thought she was right and refused to apologize, so the child stopped playing with her.
Instead of criticizing her daughter, the mother gently said to her daughter, "If you were that child, you were pushed down by others, although others didn't mean it. What would you think?"
"well ... mom, I'll make him apologize to me."
"Yes, if it were you, you would ask others to apologize. Now you are doing wrong. Why don't you apologize to the children? A person is responsible for his own mistakes. "
"Mom, let me think."
Five minutes later, the little girl walked up to her little friend and blushed and said, "I'm sorry, I was wrong just now."
The child stopped crying, looked at the little girl and apologized. She said shyly, "Never mind, let's play ball."
Then, a group of children played happily again.
Parents tell their children that it is normal to do something wrong, and they should dare to face it and admit it, so that their children have a chance to correct it. Dare to admit your mistakes, and you can get others' understanding.