For example, one of the homework assigned by the teacher on weekends is to keep a diary. Seeing that the deadline for handing in homework is coming, my daughter is still watching TV and has no intention of keeping a diary. Xiaoya couldn't help urging her daughter to turn off the TV and write a diary.
Unexpectedly, my daughter saw Xiaoya urging her, but she said angrily, "It's not that I don't want to write, I won't write!" Xiaoya was very dissatisfied with her daughter's staring at TV. When she saw her daughter's attitude, she couldn't help getting angry. She said, "I can't write or study. What's your attitude? " Is it reasonable not to write? Are everyone else born? "
After listening to Xiaoya's words, the daughter angrily walked into the room, slammed the door and locked it, which made Xiaoya's teeth itch.
By my side, many parents have had the experience of Xiaoya, and feel that the older their children are, the more disobedient they are. Indeed, when children reach the age of seven or eight, there will be a period of rebellion. As the saying goes, "There are too many dogs at the age of seven or eight", which is the age of children.
However, parents should also reflect on why children are more and more disobedient. Apart from the children's own reasons, are there any inappropriate places in parents' words and deeds? For example, is the way parents handle it incorrect, or does the child not like what parents say to himself?
As the saying goes, "a good word warms three winters, and a bad word hurts people in June." Children's understanding ability and psychological endurance are relatively weak. Therefore, when educating them, parents should pay more attention to their own educational methods and use methods acceptable to their children to produce results.
When children are young, it is inevitable to make such and such mistakes or do things that make adults dissatisfied. It is inevitable for parents to educate their children after they have done something.
Then, how should parents educate their children, make them obedient and be willing to correct their bad behavior? Kaka's mother suggested that you try the following five tips.
First, reduce the voice of criticism.
When educating their children, many parents like to criticize and scold loudly and angrily, fearing that the voice is too low for the children to hear, and they also hope to shock them. However, this practice of parents is not only unsatisfactory, but also easy to hurt children's self-esteem.
In fact, when parents criticize their children, they should not raise their voices, but lower their voices. As long as parents' voices are different from those in peacetime, children will pay attention and listen to their parents carefully.
This method of criticizing children in a low voice will be better than scolding them loudly, which will not only hurt their self-esteem, but also make them more willing to accept it.
Second, keep silent.
After a child does something wrong, he will worry that his parents will blame him. At the same time, he also believes in his heart that his parents will definitely blame him when they know that he made a mistake.
Therefore, if the parents really criticize the child as he thinks, then the child will have a feeling of "relief" and think that this matter has passed, and he will not take his parents' criticism and his mistakes seriously.
However, if the parents don't scold the child abnormally after knowing that the child has made a mistake, but just keep silent, then the child will feel very nervous because he can't guess his parents' thoughts. He will feel uncomfortable and reflect on his mistakes.
Third, gently suggest.
Under normal circumstances, when a child makes a mistake, his parents will be angry and criticize him. But if parents can change the way, instead of directly criticizing their children after they make mistakes, they can stabilize their emotions and inspire them calmly, such as gently saying to their children, "Do you think this is the right thing to do?" Is there a better way? "
In this way, children will not only understand their parents' intentions quickly, but also be more willing to accept their criticism and education.
Fourth, let children put themselves in other's shoes.
Many children are afraid of being scolded by their parents, so they like to put the blame on others after doing something wrong, hoping to escape their parents' criticism. In this case, parents need not be too angry. They can ask their children, "If you were him, how would you explain it?"
Parents let their children think from the perspective of others, and think about what they would say and do if they were the other side, which can promote their children to reflect on and understand their mistakes, and can't pass the buck to others.
Fifth, timely education after making mistakes.
Children are young and have a poor sense of time, and it is easy to "heal the scar and forget the pain". Moreover, they are lively and active by nature, and the mistakes they just made will soon be forgotten and repeated.
Therefore, after the child makes a mistake, parents must criticize education in time and cannot delay; If the child made a mistake yesterday and his parents criticized him today, then the child may have forgotten it.
Even if he doesn't forget, he will think that this matter has become a thing of the past, which leads to the failure of education to play its due role.
Conclusion: In fact, different communication methods adopted by parents for the same behavior of their children will have different effects. Criticism, reprimanding, beating and cursing will make children feel threatened and prone to rebellious behavior.
Therefore, parents can use some tips to change their children's bad behavior when educating their children.
Dear friends, do you think what Kaka's mother said is reasonable? Welcome to communicate in the comment area.