I wonder if the problem of the landlord's self-control is serious. You should first evaluate your self-control. Maybe the landlord doesn't have this problem, but he is more demanding of himself.
Self-control means that people can consciously control their emotions and behaviors. He is not only good at inspiring himself to bravely carry out the decisions he has made, but also good at restraining his wishes, motives, behaviors and emotions that do not meet the set goals. Self-control is an important symbol of strength.
Self-control means that a person is good at controlling his emotions and restraining his words and deeds in his will.
Self-control is mainly manifested in two aspects: on the one hand, make yourself strive to overcome fear, hesitation and laziness that are not conducive to yourself in practical work and study; On the one hand, we should be good at restraining impulsive behavior in practical actions.
Self-control plays an important role in people's success. From Aristotle, an ancient encyclopedic scientist, to modern philosophers, it has been noted that "a good life is based on self-control."
On the contrary, it is willful. Indulge yourself and don't limit your words and deeds. Do whatever you want, regardless of the consequences of your actions.
Self-control analysis
one
What is self-control?
The so-called self-control is a person's ability to control his thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Differences between people
A fundamental point of animals is that people are thoughtful, so they can be rational according to certain purposes.
Be careful to control your feelings and actions.
There is a book devoted to hunting, which says that a red fox wants to catch wild ducks.
It can often lurk in frozen swamps for days on end. It is so tenacious and patient, slowly.
Stick to the ground silently and approach the wild duck. When the wild duck has no intention of swimming, the red fox uses its tongue.
Lick your lips and wait in disappointment. In order to fill the hungry belly, the red fox can do this.
Go back and forth dozens of times. For three days in a row, until the wild duck was finally caught by it for a moment. this
Isn't the red fox very good at controlling his behavior? In fact, this is just a long evolutionary process of foxes.
In this process, the instinct of hunting gradually formed.
If even animals can sometimes control themselves in order to achieve a certain goal, they are not interested in thinking and feeling.
Shouldn't people control themselves better?
two
The opposite of self-control is laissez-faire
We saw a naughty child, with the love of his parents and elders, sometimes he talked too little and did things upside down. There are guests at home, and he is even more mischievous and restless for a moment. This is the so-called "Renlaifeng".
Of course, children's self-control is inherently weak, and it is understandable to be a little crazy. However, why can't some young people restrain their words and deeds when they are sensible? One of the most important reasons is to let yourself go.
For example, smoking is just for fun at first, but some people never seriously think about why they smoke, just let themselves smoke blindly. So one for two, one for two, until it becomes a hobby, old habits are hard to change. Isn't this the beginning of letting yourself go?
If blind indulgence is a corrosive agent of self-control, then self-control is an effective weapon to conquer indulgence. A famous example is Pavel Colta King's story of quitting smoking described in How Steel was Tempered. Once, young people had an argument about whether they could get rid of this problem. Some people say; Habits are worse than people, and once they are formed, they cannot be changed. Smoking is an example. Paul disagrees with this view. He believes that people should control habits, but never let habits control people. Wouldn't it be ridiculous to draw a conclusion? At this time, someone sarcastically said that Paul was bragging because he knew smoking was bad but didn't quit. Paul was silent for a while, took the cigarette from the corner of his mouth, crushed it and said firmly, "I will never smoke again." If a person can't get rid of bad habits, he is worthless. " After that, Paul really gave up smoking. Every young man who doesn't want to be "worthless" should, like Paul, make up his mind to fight his bad habits through self-control.
three
Self-control belongs to the category of will.
People with strong self-control are often strong-willed. It takes will to control yourself. Will, like thought, is not innate, but gradually cultivated and exercised in social practice. To enhance self-control, we should start from daily life and strengthen training. When he was young, American physicist Franklin made up his mind to "overcome all bad natural tendencies, habits or the temptation of his partner." He made a moral plan for himself, including thirteen names, and implemented them one by one. For example, in order to correct women's habit of talking and telling jokes, he listed a "silence" and asked himself to do it: "Unless others agree to talk, avoid trivial conversations." Later, a friend said that he often showed pride. So he added "modesty" to the list. When he wrote his autobiography in his later years, he talked about the plan of exercising self-control when he was young, and thought that his achievements should be attributed to temperance.
Appreciation: It is the task of argumentative writing to ask, analyze and solve problems. This paper mainly discusses three issues: what is self-control, why it is necessary, and how to strengthen it.
The theme of the article is closely related to the power of habits in life, so this article adopts a variety of examples and comparative argumentation methods to make the article concise, vivid and clear. For example, when discussing what is self-control, give a short story about a red fox hunting wild ducks, and make a comparison between the fox's actions and human behavior, which strongly shows that people should have self-control. Pavel Colta King, a soldier with an "iron" will, and so did Franklin, a great physicist.
Examples prove that the argument is more typical and thorough, and it also makes the article smooth and natural.
four
The realization of the goal depends largely on one's self-control.
Self-control means that a person is good at controlling his emotions and restraining his words and deeds in his will.
Self-control is mainly manifested in two aspects: on the one hand, make yourself strive to overcome fear, hesitation and laziness that are not conducive to yourself in practical work and study; On the one hand, we should be good at restraining impulsive behavior in practical actions.
Self-control plays an important role in people's success. From Aristotle, an ancient encyclopedic scientist, to modern philosophers, it has been noted that "a good life is based on self-control."
1 Strengthen ideological cultivation. People's self-control depends on their own ideological quality to a certain extent. Therefore, the most fundamental way to improve self-control is to establish a correct outlook on life and the world, and maintain an optimistic and healthy mood.
2. Improve cultural literacy. People with higher cultural quality can often understand things comprehensively and correctly, understand their relationship with others, and consciously control and improve themselves.
3 stabilize the mood. Use reasonable methods such as venting, diverting attention and transferring environment to vent and release emotions that will trigger impulsiveness, maintain emotional stability and avoid impulsiveness.
4. Strengthen self-awareness. When things happen, be calm, use your own brain, eliminate external interference or hints, and learn to make your own decisions. We should completely get rid of dependence on others, overcome inferiority, and cultivate self-confidence and independence.
5. Strengthen practical exercise. On the one hand, we should strengthen study, accumulate knowledge, broaden our horizons, arm and enrich ourselves with knowledge, improve the level of analyzing and solving problems, and expand our ability to decide things by learning from other people's experience; On the other hand, we should actively participate in the practice of army life, exercise hard, constantly enrich our experience and improve our adaptability.
6. Enhance the power of will. We should cultivate the good quality of independent will in our own character. Be highly aware of what you are striving for. As long as you find something through your own practice, you should go on without hesitation and strive to achieve the expected goal. You don't have to pursue perfection in everything, you don't have to demand that you don't fail at all, and you don't have to care too much about what others say about you.
7 Adjust the required structure. When demands cannot be considered at the same time, suppress some impossible demands. The ancients said, "You can't have your cake and eat it. I take bear's paw instead of fish. "
8. Strengthen positive thinking. As the saying goes, "everything is established in advance, and it is abolished without advance." Usually pay attention to thinking about problems frequently, enhance foresight, and make timely, decisive and accurate choices at critical moments.
How to improve self-control?
1? Strengthen ideological cultivation. People's self-control depends on their own ideological quality to a certain extent. Generally speaking, people with lofty ideals and ambitions will never have bad behavior because of trivial matters. Therefore, the most fundamental way to improve self-control is to establish a correct outlook on life and the world, and maintain an optimistic and healthy mood.
2? Improve cultural literacy. Generally speaking, a person's cultural accomplishment is directly proportional to his tolerance and self-control. People with higher cultural quality can often understand things comprehensively and correctly, understand their relationship with others, and consciously control and improve themselves.
3? Stabilize your mood. Use reasonable methods such as venting, diverting attention and transferring environment to vent and release emotions that will trigger impulsiveness, maintain emotional stability and avoid impulsiveness.
4? Strengthen self-awareness. When things happen, be calm, use your own brain, eliminate external interference or hints, and learn to make your own decisions. We should completely get rid of dependence on others, overcome inferiority, and cultivate self-confidence and independence.
5? It is necessary to strengthen practical exercise. On the one hand, we should strengthen study, accumulate knowledge, broaden our horizons, arm and enrich ourselves with knowledge, improve the level of analyzing and solving problems, and expand our ability to decide things by learning from other people's experience; On the other hand, we should actively participate in the practice of army life, exercise hard, constantly enrich our experience and improve our adaptability.
6? We should strengthen our willpower. We should cultivate the good quality of independent will in our own character. Be highly aware of what you are striving for. As long as you find something through your own practice, you should go on without hesitation and strive to achieve the expected goal. You don't have to pursue perfection in everything, you don't have to demand that you don't fail at all, and you don't have to care too much about what others say about you.
7? Adjust the required structure. When demands cannot be considered at the same time, suppress some impossible demands. The ancients said, "You can't have your cake and eat it. I take bear's paw instead of fish. "
8? We should strengthen positive thinking. As the saying goes, "everything is established in advance, and it is abolished without advance." Usually pay attention to thinking about problems frequently, enhance foresight, and make timely, decisive and accurate choices at critical moments.
How to enhance self-control?
I think we should do some "tempering rules" while strengthening the legal system and morality.
The "tempering rule" is very important for cultivating the qualities of self-denial and self-control. For example, when Edmund Hillary, the first New Zealander who successfully conquered Mount Everest, was asked how he conquered the highest mountain in the world, Hillary replied, "What I really conquered was not a mountain, but myself." This excellent quality is called willpower, self-control or self-discipline. In fact, you can start from doing something you don't like or think you can't do every day, and cultivate your stronger willpower and self-control under the action of "tempering method"
You also know that only through practice can you really gain self-control. Only by relying on inertia and repeated self-control training can we completely control our nerves. Judging from the repeated efforts and training of the will, the cultivation of self-control is largely the formation of a habit. "
And the most effective, convenient and practical advice I can give you is to jog 5 kilometers every morning. Whether the weather is cold or hot, windy or rainy, we must persist. Every minute in bed in the morning is so precious, especially in winter, when you lie under the covers and get up after a fierce ideological struggle. Moreover, long-distance running is hard and boring, and it will also make people backache. It's really a real chore, so you can be honed in this process, starting from scratch, from fresh to annoying to painful. You can think about a sentence by Mark Twain. Explain how to achieve self-restraint: "The key is to do something you don't want to do every day, so that you won't feel pain for those obligations that really need you to complete." This is the golden rule of forming conscious habits. " As long as you persist, with the gradual improvement of your physical condition, running becomes easier and the drudgery of running seems less terrible. Although getting up early is still a bit laborious, it seems to be overcome. Everything becomes easier and more natural, and finally becomes a habit and a part of daily behavior. Don't force yourself, running every morning becomes a natural habit. In this way, your self-discipline, determination, will, commitment, efficiency, self-confidence and self-esteem will be exercised and improved through daily running.
You can choose to run long distances every morning to help you develop a high degree of self-control. You can also choose various sports activities. No matter what you choose, it is first and foremost a chore that you must force yourself to complete. Secondly, this chore must be done every day. Finally, of course, this chore should also be beneficial (for example, physical exercise can help health, improve physical function, enhance self-confidence and improve cognitive ability, etc.). You can choose all kinds of hard work, such as running, bodybuilding, swimming, cycling, walking, aerobics, yoga, martial arts and so on. There are countless ways of physical exercise, but it doesn't mean that your efforts are limited to physical exercise. Practicing a musical instrument, reading or writing, correspondence with friends or writing emails are also applicable. What kind of drudgery you choose is not important in itself, but persistence is the key to the problem. Insist on doing something you didn't like very much every day, and eventually you will gain self-discipline, perseverance, keep your promise and enhance your self-control.
Self-control also plays an important role in improving physical and mental health. People who can't control their emotions and behaviors will not have a healthy body and a healthy mind. In order to improve self-control, the following six methods can be adopted. ?
1? Diversion method?
When you are greatly stimulated, you can think or do something else first. For example, Turgenev, a famous Russian writer, suggested that people turn their tongues in their mouths 10 times when an argument is about to happen. ?
2? Psychological suggestion?
For example, Lin Zexu used the banner of "controlling anger" to control himself, while Su Shi used the words of "forbearing small anger and making great plans" to encourage himself to keep a good mood when encountering bad stimuli. ?
3? Avoid excitement?
When you encounter stimulation that may make you lose self-control, you should try to avoid it. If someone scolds me next door, I won't listen. Go out for a walk. In this way, we can avoid the conflict caused by anger. ?
4? A reasonable way to vent?
Some people will vent their emotions by listening to music and drawing when they are in mood swings.
5? Positive compensation method?
That is to use the powerful motivation generated by anger and passion to find a job you like and work hard, or study hard, or study hard at your desk, so that negative emotions can be actively used. ?
6? Do the opposite?
Is to do what you don't want to do first, that is, deliberately try to make yourself feel bad. ?
Self-control is a kind of willpower, a manifestation of self-esteem, self-love and self-respect, which enables us to choose the best behavior plan, pass the fork in the road smoothly and always move in the right direction.
So how can one cultivate self-control?
(1) master your own thoughts. Without the guidance of consciousness, people can't have specific behavior. To control your mind, you must understand what you want and what you can't want. This is a cognitive problem. Then try to refuse what you can't do and force yourself to do what you should do. This is a matter of method. Finally, consider what will happen if you do it and what will happen if you don't. This is the premise of establishing perseverance, and it is also the transition from controlling thoughts to controlling behaviors.
(2) control the target. Goals are the core of thought and the guide to action.
Controlling goals is an important way to achieve success. To control the goal, we must set the goal. Have long-term, medium-term and short-term goals. Long-term goals and short-term goals should be carried out at the same time, so as to be aware of them and be busy without confusion.
(3) control time. People live in time and space, space accommodates people, and time changes people. Many people can't do things well, but they just don't make good use of their time.
You should make overall arrangements based on what you intend to do and your personal situation. This is not an easy task. People often don't understand not only what they want to do, but also when and how long it takes to do something. If many things are fully integrated with limited time, things are done well and time is not wasted, you can choose time to work, play and rest. When we can control time, we can change everything about ourselves.
In daily life, always remind yourself to be self-disciplined and consciously cultivate the spirit of self-discipline. For example, it is better to limit a time limit and focus on correcting a shortcoming or bad habit of one's personality.
Never indulge yourself and make excuses for yourself. Be strict with yourself. After a long time, self-discipline will become a habit and a way of life, and your personality and wisdom will become more perfect.